Thought the first:
The results clearly show that white Americans hate the government more than they hate racism and sexism.
We see that they hate the system enough that relevant experience becomes a negative and lack of experience a positive; that they want change, regardless of what it is, more than they want to embrace and protect their brothers and sisters who are Black, Hispanic, gay, female, chronically ill.
When framed in this way I find myself beginning to find something that I can... understand isn't the exact word I want, because I do not (and will never) understand why anyone finds that man to be a suitable and respectable face of the United States, but it's a framework I can, at least, process. I was a research scientist in an old life; I need to understand some form of why before I can really begin*.
Thought the second:
The new President is not necessarily the scariest piece on this new chessboard (which is surprising in itself). The Vice President is equally terrifying in his horrible, backwards, compassion-less approach to women, to LGBTQ+, to foreigners. But the scariest thing of all is that a full half of our nation either follows this awful rhetoric or found it unoffensive enough to make a vote for non-traditional government a net win. The scariest thing of all is the possibility that 50% of the people I interact with either consider me through a set of sexist, racist**, homophobic filters, or care so little about my sex & gender, my race, and my queerness that they consider me - my friends, my family - an acceptable side-product loss in the all-important act of, basically, giving the government a middle finger.
Thought the third:
It is true that we don't know what the 45th Presidency will be like. It is possible that the situation will be less dire than people expect. But how true? How possible?
Actions speak louder than words, and the actions we have seen at rallies have been (socially, mentally, physically) brutal - and the actions of the P & VP have been to condone these actions rather than shame them; to encourage them, to laugh at them, to cheer them, rather than to denounce and disable them.
I refuse to give the "benefit of the doubt" to a set of people whose visible actions in the last 12+ months have been deplorable. Words and speeches mean nothing compared to actual data.
Thought the fourth:
There are calls to be kind, to attempt understanding and teamwork, and I would correct that phrasing somewhat myself: we need to be kind, yes, but we need to not let calm turn into complacency. We need to be a hard kind, a strong kind; we need our goodwill to have teeth. Working together is the only way we can move out of this, yes; but I see no real reason to be "kind" to someone promoting agendas of racism, of sexism, of assault on woman-bodies and conversion camps for the LGBTQetc.
We need to avoid descending to the low level of the very thing we are fighting, yes, but I do not truly think you can kill hate entirely with only kindness and love. I also - less, or maybe more, importantly - do not think myself capable of showing true kindness to someone whose actions and beliefs condemn myself and my friends to danger and to a lesser-than status.
Thought the final:
I still feel like this is a world that doesn't exist; like this didn't happen, like it couldn't have happened. Possibly because I watched it unfold while in the airport in another country, on another continent, through the tiny pocket-size screen of my smartphone -- but also partly because, I fear, I still had a piece of faith left in (white) humanity.
* begin here meaning the process of sorting through my own feelings and determining the path i want to take
** "racist" does not actually apply to me here, as I am white AF, but I needed to recognize it in this sentence