seventhe: (SAZH)
Somewhere in the back of my brain I've got a big 2013 New Year's Resolutions post brewing, but this is not that post. This is just a public announcement, because I figure it's fitting that one of my first actual actions of the new year has been registering for my remaining 4 credits of graduate research at the University of Akron.

I figure that since the general desire to finish my thesis and get all gradumitated and get this over and done with hasn't been enough motivation for me to actually do it, maybe the $1800 I just shelled out in tuition credits will be. :/

I mean it this year, folks. I know I've been saying it for a while, but I actually mean it this year. I'm done with this shit. I need to finish. I'm so tired of having the shadow of this hanging over my head and getting in the way of my actual life.

I will get my masters in 2013. Fuck it.
seventhe: (Tifa: bad)
My body's still busted up.

I've been fighting bronchitis for two weeks now. Some of it is my fault: I came down with it the week the Japanese Overlords were here, so I really didn't want to take sick time off of work and leave my discussions and presentations to someone else; I ended up just taking a lot of drugs and cough drops. I'm also dumb because I continued to run and work out for the first week because I don't like admitting defeat to my own body. When it didn't start to clear up on its own I went to a CVS MinuteClinic and got me some drugs for it, but I think working/working out through it has aggravated it and made it worse. That's mostly my own stupidity, and I probably deserve it, but the bronchitis just had particularly bad timing this year.

I haven't done any kind of cardio (running, swimming, or elliptical) in a week, and I haven't even done weights since last Friday. I've also been sleeping like a goddamned fiend - last Thursday I took the afternoon off sick, took a 4-hour nap, got up and ate and read a little, and basically went back to bed and slept for 10 hours - so it isn't like my body doesn't know something's wrong. I pretty much slept away the entire fucking weekend. At this point I'll probably just rest right on through to the Marathon Relay on Saturday, other than PT today. It's going to be a pretty horrible race for me. :/ I'm sure it will be fun hanging out with everyone, but I'm really just not looking forward to the running bit.

PT doesn't seem to be doing much yet. Every time I seem to think things are improving, it then gets worse. I know from experience that this unidentified friend in my neck works in horrible synergy with the rest of me - so when I'm sick, or when I have really bad insomnia, it's way worse - so for now I don't know whether my bronchitis is compounding the issue by way of general aches and pains, or if it's actually worsening. I just -- I thought PT was supposed to provide some kind of relief (as well as fixing what's broke)? Other than the traction machine (which I may actually propose to) it doesn't really seem to do much in terms of relief.

I just get really depressed when I constantly feel like shit. (surprise, feeling like shit makes you feel like shit?)

I'm really ready to not be coughing and dizzy all the time, and I'm super ready to not have constant pain in my neck/shoulders/back. :/

In marginally less whiny news:
  • I've contacted my advisor, I'm trying to pick up my literature search again, and I'll hopefully talk to her and go to some group meetings this month :/ (file under: other things I am not excited about)

  • This weekend I somehow managed to pull together a decently respectable Terra costume for NYCC. There's still plenty of things which can be done with it, but it's more or less going a lot better than I expected. It would be nice to have one 'constant' cosplay that I can wear wherever. (file under: upcoming nyc drunk vacation)

  • I'm almost finished with a stupid scarf I've been working on for like a year (I lost the pattern okay .___. ) and I have lots of epic plans for scarves and cowls and hats and fun things to knit for the winter. (file under: things i will not end up doing)

  • Work is somewhat in a lull right now, which is both nice and epically worrisome. No further developments there right now.

I'm trying to at least enjoy the weather. Autumn is my favorite season, and I love that it's colder out. I love the way the air smells, and I love the colors that are coming out. I just wish I felt better to enjoy it. :/

[edit] also I dyed my hair red. and that's really about it.
seventhe: (Life: stress out and die)
1. I have figured out, through some intense reflection during a boring meeting I wasn't involved in but had no chance to escape, that the answers I actually need to manage my project are an entire layer underneath the questions that I have been asking. (WORKCEPTION????) I've been asking for targets; what I actually need is a more clear fundamental understanding of the way work is supposed to flow from conception into production, and the role my project plays in the entire process, where communication goes and where priorities are. There isn't a process, by the way, and that's why I always feel so goddamn lost, and why even asking for clear targets isn't going to fix the mess I'm wading through. I actually need to go deeper.

I've set an appointment with the visiting Overlords on Monday and I plan to basically bang heads against a table with my newfound understanding of the situation I am in until someone cries uncle and gives me what I want.

2. I just emailed my advisor. I am back in the game. Thesis complete and Masters Degree by spring semester 2013.

Because fuck everything.

3. I am super stressed at the moment. :(

4. Icon (DW) has never been more relevant.
seventhe: (Ohayo: THAT OTHER GUY)
  • Today is the first day I've worked in 2012 and not had a single meeting. The next after this? 05 March. What the hell.

  • At 620 comments - and growing - I'm pretty sure this is the greatest FF Kissing Battle we've had yet. Even if you're not on a team, come on in and play!
    • I'm writing tons of Final Fantasy / Gundam Wing crossovers. SHOOT ME.

  • So I've been diagnosed with arthritis in my big toe. The injury's a long story; the tl;dr version is that I'm off any kind of high-impact stress on it for 2-3 weeks and I maybe shouldn't run very much in my future also (depends on how it "heals" (since arthritis doesn't exactly, you know, fix itself: HEY CARTILAGE. GROW BACK ALREADY)). On one hand: OH DARN I DON'T LIKE RUNNING ANYWAY. On the other hand: I am a stubborn Taurus fuck and I don't like the idea of my body winning the war against me when I'm only 30 years old. CUE ANGST AND SPACEHEARTING.

  • Oh, and I'm on goddamned prescription drugs again. AGAIN. (No drinking for 2-3 weeks? LIKE FUCK YOU SAY.)

  • It's 20 February and I have yet to do a single goddamn thing for my graduate thesis. I hate school so much.

  • Speaking of not working on grad school: !! My schedule for the next few weekends is like being PUNCHED IN THE FACE WITH AWESOME. It goes like this: DISTANT WORLDS --> BJORK (!!!!!!!!!!) --> possible trip to the plant which is shitty --> PITTSBURGHCON --> LESBIAN GARAGE SALE SHIT SHOW --> Acen --> MY GODDAMNED 30th BIRTHDAY --> Katy's graduation --> CABINCON PART I ("A HOT TUB IS NOT CAMPING"). I am really not leaving my 20s quietly.

  • I cleaned up my tags on DW this afternoon. I'm finally back under 1000. I really need to do the same on LJ, but LJ lacks the AMAZEBALLS "tag merge" tool that Dreamwidth has, for when you type a tag in just a little bit wrong and end up with 3 variants on the tag, "I am a vain fuck." (This is a true story!).

  • The word "amazeballs" was actually in TIME magazine BTW.

  • Zero ships 3x4 is one of the most hilarious things I've read all day. I would easily say "the most hilarious" on any other day but as the other things going on in my email right now are (1) a serious discussion on which crossover troll fic idea is the lube for the other and (2) the creation of an Opera in at least 14 movements about The Shit Show Of Our Lives, there's some stiff competition in my Inbox today. Nevertheless, read that shit.

  • I have not played more than a couple hours of FFXIII. Don't judge me. So far the PS3 has basically been a very expensive way to steam music and Netflix. Winning.

  • Going to rewatch some Sherlock this week. Might have intelligent thoughts about it. Might just reblog more shite on Tumblr.

And that's the news.
seventhe: (Life: stress out and die)
so that I don't get super overwhelmed here.

I got an A in lab. I'm pretty proud of that.

My final overall GPA is 3.775 (since I don't think research credits count towards GPA, I think they are just credits), over four years with a challenging and relevant full-time job. I'm pretty proud of that too. \o/

When my prof emailed me about my grade she also said she wanted to keep in touch about my thoughts on the MS/part-time program. She said she thought it would be appropriate to present it to the department, which is my eventual goal anyway. So that made me pretty happy.

The two kittens who were taken last night are coming back to me so that they can spend the next 2-3 weeks with Mama, but B+J have agreed to take 2 of them!!! once they are old enough. So not only do I have a home for 2, but they get to be adopted together -- and B+J get 2 weeks to prepare which is better for them too. I am really relieved about that.

Yesterday I seriously thought I was getting sick, but I think the fever was just some aftermath from my hypoglycemic shock, because today I feel okay. Tired, but okay. So I'm happy about that.

And I have cake.
seventhe: (Cats: I LIKE THEM)
Usually I lock the entries that have to do with UAkron, but I (finally) have something good to say about them, so I think I will let this one stand as one high (counter)point against my ongoing internet diatribe. :)

As some of you know: last week Friday during lab I was talking with the lab professor. She was telling me some things about the department, upcoming changes they're discussing, and we got to talking about the part-time program. She told me there was a meeting coming up discussing the Masters program and the part-time program, and we got to talking about its weaknesses and problems, and I think she could see how invested in this I am (spoiler: it's not hard to see), because she asked if I had any points, complaints, concerns, or comments -- she offered to bring them up in the meeting anonymously.

Oh, I said. Um. I have a list. I have documents I'm compiling.

She said, if you send me something, I will make sure it's heard, anonymously.

Now: I can't pass up something like that. You all know how hard I've been working, for years, and how hard I've been hoping to find someone who cared. So I went home thinking about it - and over the weekend decided that I didn't really want to dump my rant list on this professor.

And on Monday, when I sent her a note about the lab, she replied asking again for my thoughts and telling me that she would represent my concerns at this meeting.

So Monday night I stayed up, going through my old LJ entries (note to self: my journal did not actually import into DW like I thought it did; my tags and some icons did, but the entries didn't. As soon as LJ isn't dying of DDoS, fix this), which are all tagged for this very reason - reconstructing the hardest moments of my graduate school career. I was very careful with what I wrote. I selected only 4 or 5 main "concerns" or "topics", and when I addressed each problem, I also took the time to write constructive suggestions to help alleviate each area of concern I presented. I also was very careful with my tone, to remain straightforward and professional, to keep each concern clear, concise, and precise without dampening my concern. I removed any particular personal details - both to avoid the feeling that this was just a rant, and to keep my anonymity (many of the professors in question definitely would remember these incidents since I confronted them the first time).

I had two people read it over for me to ensure it was tactful, professional, and coherent. (I'm pretty sure both of them suggested things I had forgotten, that is how bad this program has been.) And then I sent it to her.

(If anyone wants to read it, I don't necessarily mind sharing it, although I will do so privately/locked.)

I also told her in the email that while I appreciated her offer of anonymity, I was more than willing to stand behind my words, and especially if the department wanted to talk with me further about suggestions for improvement - I would be more than happy to meet, discuss, brainstorm, and help in any way I could.

(Because frankly, my anonymity won't last for long. I would say I've had personal confrontations with about 75% of the professors I've had in this department. And I am all in on this.)

I was pleased enough to have found someone who was interested in what I had to say - someone who valued a part-timer's opinion, first and foremost, because that respect and acknowledgment has been ultrarare. But second - not only did she care about my opinion, she agreed with me on much of what we talked about.

And today I heard back from her. She thanked me for my commentary, and said that she really liked what I had written and while it ended up not being the appropriate meeting she has filed it away in her head for future use, because she thinks it's important: a really valid argument and a valuable angle which is being completely overlooked.

I hope I don't have to tell you how much I am smiling right now. After four years of wrestling, one small victory feels really, really awesome.

Thanks, M.
seventhe: (FFEX: Doink!)
So the lab report I just completed was like an introduction to polymeric manipulation and finishing methods. It was a lot more qualitative than the other lab reports - we watched demonstrations and did small experiments, and we had to answer questions rather than produce analysis and calculations.

For a lot of the questions asked, we weren't given the material to answer them in class (big surprise) and thus had to look them up. And I won't lie: out of my 20 or so citations in this report, probably 12 of them are different Wikipedia pages.

It makes me feel very funny. I'm from an age where I grew up not having the internet at my fingertips for answers -- and even when I was in university, citing a website was a fringe-y sort of no-no, or "not unless you have to" type thing. (Yup: surprise, Dear Readers, I am old.)

Now, on this report, a lot of that is just not caring - I actually emailed the professor to ask where I could find some information I was having trouble googling, and her response was "Most, if not all, of the grad students here use Wikipedia. If you want better information you can try [books X and Y] in our science library." My first response was "Oh good, Wikipedia wasn't very informative"... and that was quickly followed by "Um, it's Monday; when the hell am I going to get to the science library to look this stuff up before Friday."

No wonder online sources - Wikipedia or others; I happen to love the Macrogalleria for polymer stuff; don't laugh, it's very informative - are so common nowadays. Who wants to trudge down to a library - or even into their (really messy) study and pile of used textbooks - and flip through pages of indexes and tables of contents and chapters to find the structure of cellulose acetate? When I can type it into Google and find it in seconds? And it counts -- they don't seem to care as long as you cite it properly, and I've got ACS format all over this guy. I am a citation and reference badass.

And it seems cool in a way, too, that there is so much information out there that can be easily found and I can spend 15 minutes reading up on birefringence and dichroism before I have to answer those sections -- and then I can move right on to poly(methyl methacrylate) without having to get up and find a totally different textbook.

It's just interesting to me, the concept that something like Wikipedia is ok as long as it's cited properly and labeled. I know some of you are librarian-types, so don't laugh at me for using Wikipedia, my prof totes said it was okay and I am a lazy lazy asshole.
seventhe: Rydia (Rydia)
This semester I'm taking my last class - a 3-credit Polymer Science lab, that runs for 6 hours on Friday, 9-3. *CUE GROANING*

At the very first class - a safety and syllabus overview - the professor introduced us to the class by saying: "This is the worst class you're going to take in your entire PhD." Which I am sure is a great way to start off the semester with high morale!

Basically, we run experiments on lab days, and reports - big honking 10-20 page reports with error analysis (and not the good HONKing either) - are due two weeks after the lab, rolling. So on Week 1 I will do Lab 1. On Week 2 I will be writing Report 1 and doing Lab 2. On Week 3 I will be finishing and turning in Report 1, writing Report 2, and doing Lab 3. This continues until the end of the semester, or until I die, whichever comes first.

Have I mentioned that they make grad students take this class by itself because it's so much work? FULL TIME grad students, that is. So this semester? I'm carrying a FULL TIME workload. With just this one class. Remember: I have a job! A hard one! It's already full time!*

On top of this GREAT AND EFFICIENT schedule come the following two awesome points:
  1. They are trying to redo the lab experiments, to improve them. However, this means that the new ones last year? NONE OF THEM WORKED. Students got to choose between (a) working extra in the lab to get good data or (b) attempting to write a 10-20 page lab report and answering all assignment questions with bad data. That's a lose-lose situation to me, but do they care? Apparently not, because the prof doesn't seem to think many of the labs this year will be much better. Great. Glad we care about quality.

  2. They've apparently run out of second-(or-greater-)year students on assistantships supported by the department, so. My TAs and teachers and lab assistants? Are the students in the class.
    Just think about this one for a long second here. The students taking the class right now... will be teaching the class. And taking it. As they teach it.
    These are first-year students. They've only been through the first half of the core - our first 5 courses**. That's it.
    So these first-year students will be coming on Monday, learning about the lab and setting it up, and then teaching it to us. While they also do it.
    I don't pity them and I won't blame them for doing a shit job; that's a shit situation to be in. But I am also Not Very Excited for the amount of help (read: zero) I'll have on these labs.

I just. University of Akron, you may consider this an official public notice: YOU'RE DOING IT WRONG, GUYS.

I'm not looking forward to this.

It's my last class, and with that in mind, I'm going to just shoulder on through until May. I'm basically making myself harshly limit the amount of time I spend socializing or traveling or doing other stuff, and I'm looking at my schedule to trim out things. I can survive this, and it'll be worth it when it's done.

My plan is: I am going to save Thursday and Friday nights all for homeworking and lab reporting. This means no more weekend-long trips, not until May (except for a very few rare exceptions, like Ohayocon and a birthday or two). Only one night per weekend for socializing or hanging out. If I get behind on things, I will take a half day of vacation to work on them, rather than stay up all night. I can't afford to get sick this semester because there aren't any lab makeups I can attend (seeing as I work). I'm going to have to be pre-emptively careful, not just careful. Or else this is going to suck, a lot.

So: yay. And, uh, sorry to those of you who I hang out with in real life, but I really do need to make myself do this. It isn't that I don't love you! I promise. Really. in my pants.

On the plus side, this is the last semester you'll hear me whining about class.

* If we factor in travel time - JUST travel time, not errands or the gym or anything else I will be doing during the week - I'll be pulling 55 hour weeks. If I count nothing but work and school and driving there and back. :/ That also doesn't include homework time or, you know, anything like eating or chores (adulthood is its own part-time job (ADULTHOOD SUCKS)).
** Yes, the UAkron PolySci core is frigging ridic. The first semester is 5 courses. Who does that. No wonder this damn degree has taken me 4 years.

seventhe: (FFEX: Doink!)

Well, okay.

I am going to separate this out into two parts: some big, fundamental things that I think need discussing, and some smaller, within-the-system, more reasonable things I think are relevant.

It's going to become a ramble and I am sure there are a lot of things I am going to miss. I have definitely NOT said everything I have to say about academia; this came out being more about academia as a whole, and I could write another 8000 words on effing grad school. But I don't want to let this eat up 2 hours of my evening. Have a sampling.

The big picture of academia... needs to change )

But what can we do NOW? )

I told myself I'd stop writing this at 8:00 and it is already 8:05 so I am going to post but I KNOW I HAVEN'T SAID ALL I WANT TO SAY so uh feel free to give me some leading questions if you are so inclined etc etc seriously, this doesn't even get into the way I would GUT graduate school and START OVER in so many places so.... dammit Cendri way to give me a topic I could cover for a week >.>

This is part of my 30 Days of Posting meme - feel free to check out the schedule of posting! My month is full, but if any of the posts make you want to ask for something else, go ahead and leave a comment anyway! DW || LJ


Nov. 24th, 2009 08:07 am
seventhe: (Default)
So today a professor of mine arbitrarily extended his class for two hours, right into my work day. This is the same professor who arbitrarily moved his class to Friday afternoon even when I told him I was unavailable and then didn't confirm the time until 10pm the night before the class, which meant I could either 1) miss class entirely or 2) bust ass to come up with an alternative.

I've emailed him reminding him (like I TOLD HIM at the beginning of class; oh, I've learned: if you don't tell them they assume you're all full time students) that I have a job I am already skipping out on to attend his class at normal time and that I don't have vacation to spare on his bullshit.

It ended, "Please advise."

I am so sick of this. If they don't want part-timers - if they really aren't going to give them any basic consideration - then don't accept part time students. End of story.

Posted as the latest in the ongoing neverending saga of my struggles with grad school. I am fabulously glad for this tag, because once this degree is over I'm sitting down with the department and delivering this as a report (probably without all the swearing). Their program is terrible and there is no excuse.

Now excuse me while I go do an interview and then drown my face in coffee.

Post from mobile portal
seventhe: (Default)
Well, last night's exam actually went well. I am sure those of you who have been following this journal have been waiting for me to say those words for something like eighteen years now, after semester upon semester of "I fail!" and "School sucks!" and "Wow, Polymer Science makes me want to shoot myself in the foot and the face."

It's amazing to me how much more comfortable I am with Chemical Engineering, even going on 5 years after my undergrad degree (*waves "old" flag*), especially comparing with Polymer Science: the professors are still quirky moronic asshats, but I understand them and the assignments and the material so much better. I feel like I'm learning again; Polymer Science so far has been a few safe islands of actual learning in a sea of memorization and half-assed faking my way through exams (and angry nasty emails to professors and being blacklisted and having to fight my way tooth and claw through their part-timer prejudice). This has just been a single chem.-E class, but it's already better than the 10 PolySci classes I have under my belt.

Although - I do feel like I'm better at my job with more polymer-based knowledge, so I do not think it was a waste.

I think I'm just a natural engineer.

Either that, or one department is just nicer than the other. ;)

It throws the future into an interesting light. Do I cram next semester and actually finish all my classwork by May 2010? I don't think you guys understand how tempting that sentence really is to me. I have been at this since 2007. It would be nice to be done. And after that, what? My (future husband) boss still wants me to go for a Ph.D. I am more tempted now that I've felt the joy of homecoming in the chemical engineering department. Do I go back to Chem-E? Do I go back at all?

It has been an interesting month or so here in SevLand. I feel like – it feels like I've been treading water, running in place, fighting my ass off just to stay where I am and survive. It isn't just school, and it isn't just work – it's life: an overwhelming feeling of drudgery, of being stuck in one place, of stagnation, of is this really what I want? and is this really where I want to be?

But in the past little bit it's like something has… started isn't the right word: changed. Something's moving; the earth is shaking, the water's starting to flow. Analogies fail me, but maybe it's just a realization that things don't ever have to be any particular way; choices are everywhere. Funny how I give this advice to lots of people and yet don't realize it myself: isn't that what life is all about. Clearly I am a professional! AT MY OWN LIFE.

I wrote something a little while ago about dream-chasing, and me, and I didn't post it because it felt too much like a flagging of my own privilege: look at me, with a stable job and income and life, complaining about not having dreams of all things as if that even matters beyond some cosmic bullshittery. But I watch friends of mine talk about their dreams and goals and go after them like fucking champions, and it made me realize that right now I don't have dreams, I don't have goals, all I have is the steady even keel of a stabilized life. Except grad school, yes, but I don't even want this degree for any noble reason, I want it so that I can continue to work in research for the rest of my life, so that I can get myself up to the pay-scale and respect-level that I deserve for the job I do but am not given because of the lack of a single piece of paper; it's not really a dream anymore, not after all of the blood and sweat and tears (I have cried more over school than over anything else in my life, including men and pets) and angst and agony and asshattery. I had lots of things I wanted to do once upon a time but somewhere in the house payments and the grocery shopping and the homework they can get lost.

I'd said, I'm not sure if this is a good thing, because it means I have realized all my dreams already; or a bad thing, because my dreams were so little and pithy as to be easily attainable; or a very bad thing, because I didn't really have any dreams at all.

In conclusion:
  1. Apparently one good test makes you introspective, insightful, and hella whiny/emo

  2. I bit my tongue really badly on Tuesday while eating a carrot and now there is a numb nub on the tip of my tongue that tastes like mint. Did I fuck up a taste bud or something? We're talking bad, like there was blood everywhere and I had to go hide in the bathroom bad (I am such a hobo)

  3. I've already skipped a day of Daily Photo. Name something I have to take a photo of as punishment!
seventhe: (Default)



After this semester I'll have 19 credits. After next year's lab, I'll have 22/24.

I only have one more class to take after that and I am done with courses for this degree.

If I get the research project going, I could graduate in Spring of 2011.

Holy shit.

I know I have been at this for a while, but it's almost shocking to think that the end is actually in sight.. I have hated nothing as much as I hate grad school.

Spring of 2011.

Or Summer. Whatever. What matters is this: it's so much closer than I thought.

I need to sit down.

edit: the WORST part is that if I took lab AND Technology II next semester, I could be done with classes next May.

I would hate my life, but I'd be done.
seventhe: (House: Bottoms Up!)
So guess who actually got sunburnt this weekend?! If you guess me, you are correct.

Grad school, bike rides, beer making and scientific nerditude thereof, birthday parties, and more sunshine than you can shake a stick at )

Things I did not do this weekend:
  • Write any words at all.

  • [ profile] lunaticdiscord. I didn't even check my email (thx for 250+ unreads this morning guyz)


Anyway. It's beautiful here, again. I love this.
seventhe: (House: BLAH)

#2) Last night's final: long, difficult, ultimately fair if a little bit too detail-intensive. I was there the whole two hours (hate that) but since it was open-book, open-notes I think in the end I managed alright.

Important part: I am now at 12 class credits, which is 12/24 required, WHICH MEANS I AM HALFWAY DONE WITH MY CLASSES. EVERYBODY CELEBRATE.

I'm of course at 1/6 in research credits so I'm nowhere near ACTUALLY being halfway, but being halfway done with classes is a pretty big deal to me. Yay!

#3) Who has ideas of things I can ask for for Christmas?!

#4) I wish I'd get over this cold.

#5) I forgot to mention that I twisted my ankle this weekend. By falling UP the stairs. If you don't believe me ask [ profile] safety_caesars and she can confirm that I'm a total robotard. I haven't been able to walk normally on it yet but because I'm dumb yesterday I went to the gym anyway. I did a 10-min warmup on the elliptical and didn't feel it all, so I was pretty excited -- until this morning, when it's even MORE sore, probably because I worked out on it yesterday.

BTW, when you haven't been to the gym in over two weeks and you go back to lift weights, it hurts. You get really sore. I am just saying.

#6) I am really glad [ profile] katmillia got her present! WATCH SOME OF IT AND LET ME KNOW WHAT YOU THINK <3

#7) ...I don't think there is a #7!
seventhe: (Rydia: reversed)
Hey, guys, just in case any of you were wondering, or thinking about it, or if you are ever in the future thinking about it, or if you have a friend who might be thinking about it, I have two pieces of advice for you.

(1) Go back to school right away. Get a graduate degree directly after your Bachelor degree.

(2) Don't ever give the University of Akron Department of Polymer Science any of your fucking tuition money.

(1) has a disclaimer, because of course you learn so much about the world and the way it works once you have an actual job out in industry, and you really bring a lot to your classes with your experience. That being said, eight fucking years without calculus is just too much to be expected to suddenly be able to summon it all into your head. Just sayin'. In the end, I would have done something different.

(2) has no disclaimers. Unfortunately I cannot follow my own advice here, but, y'know.


Dec. 9th, 2007 09:51 pm
seventhe: (oregon trail)
Having spent every spare moment I had this weekend studying, I have made a couple observations:

(01) I am not as stupid as I thought I was; I understand the things that are going on in class (with the help of the textbook, as well as copious help from Google, Wikipedia, and the Macrogalleria). I just haven't been putting the required weekly work into these classes. This needs to change next year, apparently: more studying every weekend, which will make me a robotard nerd, but oh well.

(02) I hate studying.

(03) I hate having to be a loser and study. At least I'm grown-up enough to do it?

(04) I wish I had a real place to study. Goals for next year: obtain a working desk area!

(05) I hate studying.

(06) I especially hate memorization. I almost asked the prof in today's review session what he thought he was actually teaching us by making us memorize so much information, but... I decided to wait until after the actual exam to be a huge smartass. (See? SEE? I AM a grownup!)

(07) Grad school is a lot more work than undergrad, even part-time. Maybe it's because so far I'm in the ass-kicking intro classes; maybe it's because I've moved out of my degree/area of expertise (chemical engineering). It's probably a combination of that. But it's ALSO the fact that grad school is just a lot more fucking work. Cocks.

(08) I miss football.

Back to the books. First final Monday, second final Wednesday.


Oct. 23rd, 2007 07:48 am
seventhe: (Mac/PC OTP)
This was supposed to be me venting about a horrible test and it has somehow turned into a rant on higher education and why I hate that professors are often such fucking assholes who refuse to take responsibility for their own goddam jobs. An actual rant, with a point and all. )

So, yes, I am going to go drown my sorrows in the Trick or Treat Meme and in Pirate AUs. Be alert, because Pirates may be appearing in your LJs in the future.

[ETA] - I actually didn't realize I'd made a "studying sucks a nut" tag before trying to tag this entry. Sometimes I make myself laugh.

[ETA #2] THIS IS IMPORTANT, GUYS! This week's [ profile] cockeyed_art challenge is FF characters in Halloween costumes. YOU KNOW YOU WANT TO DO IT, DON'T LIE.
seventhe: (Sev and Enkida)
Current investment in furthering my education:

Time: 2 credit hours
Cost: ~$800
Learned: Not too much

To go: Way too much

Ugh. Why am I doing this again?
seventhe: (Kefka: Not the gay)
It's snowing today - really snowing - for the first time in Akron. Part of me is secretly pleased: I'm a Buffalo girl, I believe that winter goes with snow, period, and if it's going to be that damn cold outside we all deserve a little gorgeous whiteness. The other part of me forgot to grab gloves as I went out the door and thus is fucking freezing and angry at having to brush the snow off of my car 9,000 times today. Plus driving in the snow can be a little nerve-wracking (not for me, exactly - again, I grew up in it - but for me watching all the other morons on the road). Also, I need windshield-washer fluid and some de-icer. Must make mental note to hit Auto Zone this weekend.

I am soon up to meet with my boss, my co-worker, and everybody's boss about my plans to go back to school part-time and how to fit it in with work. Am a little nervous. Am also hoping that I get my raise notification today, as it's that time of the year and I feel I am due one.

I am still exhausted from the funeral: emotionally, physically, mentally. It was probably my worst travelling experience of all time, and that didn't help the stress and sadness of the occasion at all. I can't wait for the weekend when I can curl up with my kitty and unpack the suitcase and do my damn dishes.

Le sigh. Perhaps I will put up my Christmas tree this weekend - that's guaranteed to cheer one up for the holidays. Plus, Rydia likes to chew on it.


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