seventhe: (SAZH)
I know that fibromyalgia and depression are linked - I've done *plenty* of research - and I'm now starting to wonder how much of the depression-fits I've been having are, in fact, pain-driven. ---Not to say depression isn't depression or invalidate the fact that I'm dealing with a lot of shit!! - but I know (a) I've gotten really bad at judging pain levels because I'm in constant chronic pain, and (b) I already know my mood is affected by the pain I can't sense. I just hadn't realized that *depression* could be triggered or exaggerated by the pain I can't sense. (Don't ask me why; I would've instantly suggested it to someone else, but apparently I hold my fucked-up system to fucked-up standards.)

This week I've been so achy and inflamed and sore and just painpainpainpain that I've gone back to taking a Vicodin at night. And, this week, I've caught a second wind around 8:30 during which I feel fantastically productive: I just cleaned up & vacuumed the sunroom with very little prodding. Some night this week - not the crying one, when I did not take a Vic - I just suddenly unpacked & cleaned up & sorted & threw into the laundry allllll of the shit on my floor, some of which was the suitcase from Meg's wedding.

I don't know whether it's chance; it's an offset of the depression (I've always joked with myself that I have very manic depression); or if it's a lack of underlying static-level pain giving me the extra boost. (EDIT: or maybe it's just desperation bc the house is just that messy, cries forever)

Where's my robot body??? :/ I do not like inconsistency.


May. 30th, 2013 08:00 am
seventhe: (Cats: I LIKE THEM)
I had a very weird night that ended in a horrible dream I'm still emotional about and don't want to discuss anymore plus there is still no fucking news so LET'S PLAY A GAME. A COMMENT FIC GAME.

Reply with some subset of characters (one, two, a pairing, a friendship, a team) and some kind of premise or situation and I will write you 3-5 sentences of the fic it would turn into. AU premises are totally welcome right now. The crazier the better. Crossovers, vampire AU, whatever the hell you want.

I'd prefer you leave the comments on DW because it's easier to email-reply from my phone, but I'll deal either way: LJ is totally fine, I'll just be slower.

Stick to fandoms you know I know kthx.

seventhe: (SAZH)
A quick update while I've got a few seconds'-worth of a breather here at lunch.

(edit) QUICK UPDATE ACTUAL LOL i have managed to turn "quick lunch update" into gigantic emotional tl;dr diatribe god I am the best/worst blogger in the history of the internet

I've been excessively shitty lately. My workload - not just job but life, because apparently the amount of general bullshittery around me increases directly proportional to my stress load due to specific work bullshittery - has been godawful. I actually started typing out a list of the many things I'm trying to handle right now but deleted it because a) it was depressing me and b) it sounded like I'm playing Stress And Workload I Am The Busiest Ever Olympics which isn't ever really what I want to sound like. Suffice to say I was up to item 12 before I stopped, and that hadn't even covered work; if you'd like to play Olympics with me I guarantee I will win, which actually means I lose, I think.

additional rambles that got long )
seventhe: (Rydia: reversed)
Lots of people have already posted up their "2012 in Review" and "2013 Resolutions" posts yet. Look, I am 7 days late! It is because I'm awesome. Or, it is because I am busy. Either way, I'm going to do mine now. Seven days into January seems a fine time for someone named Seventhe P. Dragomire to post up some summary lists of memories and goals.

2012 was the year when… )

and 2013 will be the year… )Resolutions are hard. And interesting; it's easy to throw out a bunch of things at the beginning of a new calendar year and let that changing number signify a lot of changes, but I still maintain these things could be done whenever somebody feels like they're important. I also feel like doing them in large swathes can be hard: small changes are also good. So I've picked a couple things to try for January. We'll see how I do.

Overall my goal for 2013 is to have more fun. I have a pretty fun life in general, but I also work really hard for it -- I just want to keep on keeping on and be more happy. :D
seventhe: (Cats: I LIKE THEM)
I've successfully returned from 5 drunken days in the wilds of Arkansas and I am happy to report that so far, [personal profile] owlmoose, [personal profile] renay, [personal profile] zachariah, [personal profile] justira, and Phil haven't defriended me yet after seeing what I'm like in person.


The weekend was actually pretty fucking great. It was awesome to meet everyone, and we had a blast just hanging around and being silly and laughing until our faces hurt. I already can't wait until the next time we can all meet up! SEVCON 2013?

More details to come; I didn't get home until 12:30 last night and didn't get in bed until 1:00 and 6:00am was pretty fricking early. My shoulders feel like they're made out of gravel and my brain is full of glue and I'm going to the plant next week, again so there's quite a lot to take care of here.


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