the trick is to keep breathing

I've been thinking about this sort of thing this year too, especially as my own personal values and comforts were intensely challenged. On the one hand - yeah, I totally agree with you. We should always be re-evaluating the way we think based on what we experience, rather than consistently referring to old data ("how we were raised"). But man, when you're suddenly hit with a challenge you weren't expecting like a slap in the face, it becomes very difficult to not revert back to a little kid sometimes.

But I'll never make an excuse and give up, and I certainly don't WANT to be the person I was supposedly 'raised to be' - I've just noticed, this year especially, that sometimes my upbringing comes back to haunt me =/

I think, in addition to the drive to be your own person, there's also the factor of - is anyone encouraging you to think for yourself? I certainly wasn't, and was shot down when I did.

With that in mind, I'm eternally grateful for the people I surround myself with now <3