seventhe | Entries tagged with writing

no, this is not the post about job search depression. not yet.

I participate in Get Your Words Out every year as something that motivates me to make words, much like NaNoWriMo -- it isn't necessarily about "winning" either, but it's about having a reason to track words, which then becomes having a reason to write. In 2020 or 2021, I forget which, I managed to write somewhere near 350,000 words. What a fuckin' banger. A lot of it was Old Vines, and some of it was work words, and all of it was fun as hell.

The thing I noticed at the end of the year, however, was that my writing was just inconsistent -- I was carrying myself towards that goal with days where I wrote 5000, 7000 words in one day, and then not writing for the next 4 days in a row. So if I could get my ASS to the COMPUTER to do the THING, i usually could get a significant number of words done. So let's focus on that, sez my brain, and we'll be a super-writer.

2022 Sev said well, hey, there's a habit pledge for GYWO, so: I took it, with the rather extreme idea of writing 240 days out of the year. that's like 4-5 days a week. But hey! It isn't wordcount! Although I still fucking decided I was going to try to write 300,000 words. just 300K. Not 350K. lol. I'm stupid.

Then at the beginning of 2022 I lost my content writing job - more like, they hired someone full-time and let all the contractors go without warning, yes, I'm still mad - and therefore lost one of the major impetus for me actually sitting down at the computer to write. Plus, I'd been counting work words as part of the yearly target -- which I think is fuckin fair when you write for a living, yeah?, so.

And then as I realized other work had also dried up and I was going to have to start major job hunting - and then the experience of that job hunting - there was a depression zone where I absolutely dried up on words. Like, nearly completely. Most of my WIPs just kind of hung in space, and I had to start an entirely new Good Omens fic (forth the fifth) to have anything going on, and THEN it was only a super-hyperfixation on Detroit: Become Human that really pulled me out of the wordslump and back into writing things. Getting back to the WIPs has been challenging.

And with my new job, there aren't wordcounts I can tally towards anything -- I'm writing and editing at the same time, and sometimes working on things like how the fuck do we cite this and a surprising amount of meetings, and the moral of this story is that I'm unlikely to make either my formal or informal GYWO target this year -- which again, I don't do it for the win, but boy howdy did I misjudge this year.

And what have I learnt about my writing process this year? Since that was the entire point of trying a new target and a new approach? Well, fuck, I'm not sure I've learnt anything, except that it's more fun to write when people are directly cheering you on, which isn't anything new. As of today I've written about 150K, and 135 days out of the year. I am 69 days behind where I should be and there are like. Idk. 70 days left in the year? So obviously I'm not gonna make it lol.

Anyway this has been a long ramble about things that are only important in my head, with no real conclusion. Clearly I am a professional! And I need to get back to actual work!

Stay tuned for NaNoWriMo, where I try to get my 3 FTH fics out in a month while still updating at least 3 WIPs! oh my god, why am i like this? I'm so stupid?

Talk to me about your 2022 writing (or creating in general, if you're a creator but not a writer!). How did you do. How dumb am I. It is a mystery!

IDK if y'all are aware of this, but I've really been struggling with words lately. I'm a full 40 days behind my GYWO writing pledge for Days Written, and based on an informal expectation that I would write the word count I did last year, I'm only at 55%. And it's almost June, which makes me pretty damn behind.

There are a few things I've been meaning to talk about as reasons I haven't been writing -- please note this isn't because I think I owe anybody anything (except for a few lingering comms for v understanding friends) or that I really think anyone cares. It's just interesting stuff for a dialogue, really.

The key part of me not writing is that I've been caring for my three nieces weekly. This involves a 2-hr drive to my brother's house on Monday, where I pick them up from school (METL MUM) and watch them for 3 hours, then start / help / eat dinner. After dinner I can escape to the basement if I have things to do (and often do), but 3 hours with 3 young and very energetic girls can be exhausting, so it's rare that I have any spoons to write after, say, 20:00. Tuesday I wake up early to take them to school and have like 9:00-15:00 to myself, at which point I do the same thing, just a little more tired. Wednesdays I take them to school and then drive the 2 hr back to my house, at which point usually I collapse.

and there's a lot of this that has just taken far more energy than I expected. The girls, the travel, being away from my cats and my OWN grocery shopping and my safe spaces, sleeping in a strange bed (although at this point it isn't THAT strange), the wear of scope creep as weeks went on. 3 girls for 3 hours is a lot of overstimulation, which is one of the things I'm critically sensitive too -- more likely to wear me out than almost anything else.

Part 1: Fibro Sucks

We all know spoon theory, right, but -- a lot of the time I explain fibromyalgia and other chronic pain conditions using a credit or debit card analogy. Say you've got a card and every day you get X number of task energy loaded into that card. Then every time you do an activity, you swipe the card and it charges you. Some tasks - eat breakfast, shower - might be one unit of energy, while others - work 8 hours - might be six units, or eight, depending. For most ablebodied, neurotypical people, the number of tasks they can load onto their card in the morning usually averages out about equal to the energy they need for the entire day.

With fibro, first of all, you don't know how many energy credits you're going to have on any given day. You might wake up and have a 'normal' amount of energy. Or you might wake up and only have, like, 8 tasks on the card. And you have to pick how you want to spend them. Most of the time people with chronic pain disorders wake up with fewer task energy credits in their account, comparably -- this is why we're always complaining about not being able to keep up with the dishes, the laundry, the vacuuming. Our credit cards are a lot more limited. We don't get as many tasks per day as most typical people. Most people with fibromyalgia continuously run on a deficit.

And in addition -- yeah, you can borrow from the next day: you can overcharge the card. But not only does that give you less energy for tomorrow, the bank (your body) hits you with an overdraft fee, such as extensive pain, brain fog, exhaustion, or even illness. These things compound on themselves, too, until you've built up such debt that you have to spend an entire weekend in bed.

Recovery Days: When Brain and Body Are Just Done

The problem with all of this travel and work hasn't necessarily been the care itself (although man it's been great seeing the girls like this and ALSO oh man i'm super tired) -- it's been recovery. If I get up, drive / take the girls in, put in whatever work I can manage that day, care for the girls BY MYSELF, make dinner, etc... that's a full day. That's a full day for a parent. So even when I slip downstairs at 19:00 to relax, I've still put in a lot of work. And that plus the dissonance of continuous traveling has just ... it's worn down my credit card a lot.

The problem has been that I'll come home and do nothing Wednesday and usually need Thursday as a light-brain-and-body day until I'm recovered enough to feel like myself. By the weekend (when I see Actual Husband) I'm usually alright, but at that point I'm trying to forward-bank energy for next week's child care. When you run on a deficit like this, well -- my time w the girls is my top priority, they're my nieces, but/so other things start to suffer.

So one of the reasons it's been hard to write much of anything is because I've been spending far more time in Recovery Mode. Like, Hardcore Recovery Mode. (Fibro's one of the biggest reasons I don't have children of my own, although there are others.)

It's no surprise that the only things I've posted this year are comfort fic (forth, the fifth) and feral birthday gifts (weirdly specific AUs) where I had people cheering me on as I was writing AND a deadline. That encouragement piece has really, until now, been the driver. I'm finally starting to crawl out of the hole, finally looking at WIPs again, but.

And the funniest/worst piece is that I hadn't really realized up until just recently - when I started climbing out of the hole - what it was. It isn't necessarily writing burnout - because I still wanted to write - but it's other burnout, spending my energy elsewhere on other people and then needing to plug myself in like a dead phone. (My other favorite fibro analogy is the mobile phone with a shit battery and too many apps analogy.)

you just get tired of being tired, my friends. you get really tired of being tired.

i think i've miscalculated a bit on my writing projects.

last year i wrote over 300,000 words, work and fiction and fanfic combined. it was great. so i said, hell, let's go for 350,000 this year (i am a member of Get Your Words Out) and see what happens.

but i kind of got ... locked up. old vines finished early this year, and there it was, the biggest writing project i've ever completed, done. i had a big worry about "what's next" and "do something as big this time." the concept for new roads has been sitting in my backbrain for years (thanks, feral server) and so i said, yeah, this is what's going to come next.

for some reason, it isn't coming. it's still a story i very much want to write, but my head isn't in that place right now. i have a great outline and beats to hit and i open the document up and stare at it for a while, daily, until i just close it again.

i think i've made a mistake with trying to be predictable -- scheduling things. i wanted NR to some out every 10 days, but what that does is stop my brain from working on anything else if i haven't done new roads, even if i can't write NR at the time, and that just ...plugs everything up.

this is why im also taking a break from zines and events -- it's that commitment to a due date, i think? i'm not sure, but like, it feels that way. zine pieces i have to craft to get within the wordcount, which makes them good (IMO), but then you sit on the piece without feedback for a while and it's strange. i've been lucky enough to get into every zine (5? 6?) i've applied for and it's really awesome seeing my work presented as such, but like. i think that's also enough for the time being.

same with He Thinks Like A King, the fratt big bang piece that slots into place in my Marvel / Criminal Minds AU universe. it's so good, so fuckin good, the art i got is amazingly inspiring, and then the time i had set aside to hammer down and finish the fucker up ... vanished when i fell down some fucking stairs. so now i open that one, stare into it, and close it again. HTLAK is going to be some time.

(and yeah, a bunch of commissions. i. uh.)

anyway, i'm way behind on my wordcount for this year, to the point where i fell behind in tracking it, even, because stares into my own brain (accusingly). i know i can catch up but it's only going to happen if i can get myself out of this feeling of writing-for-obligation and back into writing-for-joy.

not quite sure yet HOW to do it, but oh well

Have a lot of things to say about 2020, but let's start on a positive note: writing.

I wrote over 459,000 words in 2020. (1)

that's an average of over 1200 words per day. just under 8700 words per week. this includes fanfic (64%), original fiction (5%), paid work writing (22%), and 'paid' fanfic writing for commissions / Patreon / zines (8%).

i averaged about 5500 words per week of fanfic. that's like, a decent one-shot every single week. certainly didn't see that in the output, but that's because fuckin' everything i write has to be ridiculously long.

out of this year's 290,933 words of fanfiction, 164,535 of them were Old Vines (56%). the rest went into a smattering of works and a bunch of things that haven't been posted yet.

i wrote just about 1800 words per week for pay, which tracks. it isn't solid income, but it counts.

i'm not going to get into the paid / commissions issue here, but i do want to point out that the portion of fanfic words i made this year that indirectly gave me money was only 8% of all of my annual writing, which seems fair.

there were only 3 weeks this year where i wrote absolutely 0 words at all, and one of those is a september week (see 1). My record for words written in one day is just over 8000. There were 149 days this year where I wrote nothing (41%) and 217 days where I did (59%). 217 days of writing means that if i sat down to write on any given day, i would put out an average of 2100 words.

so what does this mean? well first, it means a big fat ol' congratulations to me because this is more words than ive ever written ever in my entire damn life.

( and then... )

so in addition to my commissions (which are, yes, still coming) i've taken on some content writing work for with two different clients. It's easy stuff, for reasonable amounts of money - not a survivable income yet, but making enough for me to slide along until 01 May - and while some of it can be fun, i'm realizing that i don't want to be an online content writer for money.

no, it isn't meant to be interesting work. and there's a certain -- not pleasure, but the sense of having gained a skill, i guess, to be helping my brain learn how to do dumb work for money. if you all remember, i was severely overinvested in my career to the point where it was used abusively against me, so there's a good lesson for my head to learn on how to be detached.

but it isn't what i want the sabbatical to be like. i want my sabbatical to be writing, working on my own original fiction, building an audience in fandom, trying to actually go for it before i have to turn back and find a corporate job again.

it's funny cause i fucked up my money and that's why im here, pumping out silly 500 word articles for bit cash, so it isn't a complaint, more an awareness. I need the cash, but it also takes up so much of my time?

i feel like there are stories in me, stories i can tell, stories that would sell, and i want to reach for that - jump for it, have nothing to do all day except let words come out; i feel like i really could do it if i could settle down (and defeat ADHD and executive dysfunction, and depression, and my dumb body, of course) and have a month or two to really bang it out. in november i wrote 57K in 10 days because i did nothing else. i can do that.

anyway for now lol i need paid so i'm off to write some really ridiculous stuff, yay

Time to catch up and share here; I’ve finished my first four commissions :)

( “Fic” )

The Commissions list is, in order, as follows:

1. Queenlua
2. Elynehil
3. Sepdet
4. Rina
5. Flonnebonne
6. Clintobarto
7. Kebarnett88
8. RainDriesOut
9. Give Her The Strap
10. Awheckery
11. Mispelheim

This sets me up for ALMOST 50K STILL TO WRITE, based on the tiers requested and the knowledge that for me to tell a story I’m always gonna hit the top end of expected word count, which is a fuck load of words okay. It’s hella fun, but it means I’m gonna need to close commissions 01 April (tomorrow), until I get caught up on some of the longer ones.

Writing for pay (both commissions and professionally) has been interesting. It’s something I need to better schedule and balance; I’d like to be able to work on paid writing, fan fiction, original fiction, and personal/professional blogging all at once, on a sort of schedule. I’ll need to work that out moving forward.

Thanks again to anybody who’s helping me out right now, and you’ve got a day to slip in a comm if you want one :P

Buckle up, chucklefucks: it’s Sev, and I’m accidentally broke until April, so I’m offering fanfic commissions (and taking donations!) until I’m back on my feet.

Accepting: now until 01 April 2019

Completing: now until 01 May 2019 (unless someone requests a monster)

For the curious, here’s how I write: seventhe / sevdrag @ AO3

I’ll be posting these on AO3, and linking back on Tumblr and DW. Delivery will be within 1-2 weeks unless something goes majorly wrong, at which point I’ll let y’all know cause this is just fanfiction the world ain’t gonna end okay

Basic pricing scheme:

Donate between $1 and $5 (buy me a Starbucks!) and you’ll get an incredibly bad doodle of anything you want.

$5: 500-1000 words

$10: 1000-1500 words

$15: 1500-2000 words

$20: 2000-3000 words

$25: 3000-4000 words

$30: 4000-5000 words

$50: 5000+ words, let's discuss

Requests for these: a character/relationship + a prompt, concept, or 1-2 sentences on what you’re thinking; longer fics may have longer prompts

Ratings up to R but no explicit smut

Bonus pricing scheme:

for $10 I will write you or an OC in a dumpster with Clint Barton and Wade Wilson

$15 gets you a mock article on any subject you like

$20 gets you a “5 Times (+1 Time)” prompt

$25 gets you the smut, length to be decided by the porn

$37 exactly will get you a great take on any fanfic trope of your choice landing right around 5000 words

( Fandoms etc )

I’m not offering this because I think fanfiction should be paid for - when I’m in a good position, I’m happy to write prompts for free! - I’m asking because I’m in a cash downswing, and really hoping people like my stuff enough to help me out a bit. I’m not asking for straight donations — I’m offering something in exchange. If you can’t help, share the link or reblog, please! I love you all.

To request, reply here or on Tumblr, and I'll hit you up to negotiate details.

OK SO

I owe y’all a post on my goals - really I owe myself, but Imma pretend someone else cares because then I’ll actually post it - but I can admit that one of my goals is weekly/monthly words and weekly posting, even if at Drabble level. We did this last year if you remember —

lassarina and I collected prompts and tried to write a prompt a week. I failed then — but I think I can succeed in 2018.

So that being said: https://moogle-university.dreamwidth.org/31340.html

Drop prompts as needed. That’s basically a FF community, so if you have other fandoms you know I’m in, leave them on this post. (Uhhh those fandoms include like: Harry Potter, Stranger Things, Chrono Trigger, uh Food Network, uh what other things can I write, the fuck is a fandom - if you have a question, just ask it.)

--Rosigo being the first short story/novel in my Ausrine universe/series. The entire premise of Rosigo was that it wasn't really going to be its own story; rather, it would be an event in my characters' pasts, a big defining event, that they would refer back to during the forward-moving stories as a common-knowledge thing. Writing it out would have been a great NaNo project because, even unfinished or with gaps, it could have been that framework for when I wanted to refer back to it.

The feel I'm going for with this universe is a weird combination of the world-based, awesome "high fantasy" + the fun of "urban fantasy" but in space, so I guess a little bit of "scifi"* -- but for me the focus is on the magic in this world - the magic of space, I guess - and how the tales and concepts of magic that people believe in forges actual magical boundaries, and how a "perfect world" guided by all-knowing magic compares to a stand-in for our world now.

I'm looking for some thoughts from fellow authors and readers here.

I've realized that, while Rosigo has a plot, it isn't really a plot. Or like - it is a plot, but it doesn't resolve itself. Basically, the cast of characters is sent on a searchquest, and in the end they find something important. We have some culture clashing and some character development, and much of the conflict of the story ties in to what happens to all of them when they find this thing, but... the point of Rosigo is that what they find is a gigantic complex mystery, which then sets the undertones for what was gonna be the first story (and now may be second). The thing they find makes no sense. It's weird. It's mysterious, it's unexplained, and there is no resolution to what it could be in this book. They make it home and say goodbye for now, the end.

Question 1 is: I am assuming that this is not a very satisfactory ending for a reader?

So then, I consider what kind of plot I would add to this story. Problem is, Rosigo is a very neat standalone little thing - this is what happened - and I think I would have to bring in an external conflict to add a plotline that could be resolved. I have some that would fit! And on one hand, this could turn it from a "short story" into a "novel", right? But on the other hand, am I adding conflict for the sake of conflict...?

Question 2: go with the original flow, or add to the complexity?

As it turns out, what I may have here in Ausrine is a wonderful worldbuilding success and a few key great characters, and all I want to do is squirrel around in it, rather than considering what actually happens.

Question 3: does anyone else do this? like does anyone else just want to write about like what their characters do on the weekends and how vampires survive in space and what exactly is so great about this one place and slice-of-life stuff?? just play in the world without a clear idea of where it's going?

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

question the Nth is why do these boundaries do this? Like, if I have fantasy but it's in space, does that make it scifi or does that make it fantasy? Or a crossover? If I have magic is it automatically fantasy? aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

SO!! Rina and Sev want to do a fantastical new thing for 2017, to promote fun writing projects: We are collecting prompts to make a Master List of 52 prompts for 2017. We will write something over 100 words for 1 prompt every week. This will be a fun game for you to play.

We are mostly looking for general prompts, like: "sunlight" or "light and dark" or "aliens made us do it"; however, we will accept specific prompts for fandoms we share, which are mostly Final Fantasy games.

We are also looking for 10 "Amnesty Prompts" - which will be the 10 prompts immediately after our 52 prompt collection - which we can use any week the given prompt is not working for us.

Please leave some kick-ass prompt suggestions and help us develop our 52 Week Challenge prompt list!!!

How this will work:

Leave like up to 5 prompts at a time, with maybe 1-2 as fandom specific prompts and the rest as general. It's way cooler if you leave less than 5 at a time though, so that we can really mix up the prompts. We definitely won't put 5+ in order at once, because we like mixing it up every week.
We will input prompts as they appear, although, we reserve the right to save some prompts for our Amnesty List if they are awesome.
Come back, scan the list, and leave one or two more to mess with us!
We'll let you know when we are done -- we may collect a number of backup prompts for future use.

Comment here, or on Rina's list: everything goes into the GDoc!

READY SET UHHHHHH ... GO PLEASE sob leave us trash

Crossposts: http://first-seventhe.livejournal.com/391250.html

...that requires some backstory:

I've an original fiction world in which I've already planned at least a trilogy and a short story. The premise is easy: vampires and werewolves in space! The manifestation is more complex: lesbian werewolves and a genderqueer/genderfun vampire travel space looking for new planets with their magical were/vamp/magical girl pilot! The details are even more complicated: how do other planets, moons, suns, stars affect Earth-based fantasy archetypes? It's fantasy space trash, but with a purpose!

The world is, so far, in my head. Would anyone be interested in leaving me silly prompts to play with this month? I don't necessarily expect anyone to be interested in original fiction / original fic verse (although if you are -- awesome!!), but prompts would help me flesh everything out and get warmed up to writing! I will obviously post everything although of course no one is required to read & respond & comment or anything.

If you'd like to help, please prompt away!

Crossposts: http://first-seventhe.livejournal.com/379538.html

So over my brief microsabbatical I decided on a list of things I want to get done by the end of the year: thus, New Year's Resolutions, in reverse, ie my resolution is to have this done before the new year. See? Get it? It's like I'm clever instead of backwards and wrong!

Get Healthy [metric: exercise 3+/wk; lose 10+ lb]
Content note / Note this: being healthy and losing weight are not always the same thing! Health has a unique meaning to every individual body!
That being said: for me getting healthy and knocking off weight go hand-in-hand at this point in time. From May-September I ate poorly, rested poorly, drank too much, drowned in stress, and had no time or motivation to work out at all. That plus medication changes has resulted in what is, for my body, unhealthy poundage.
I miss swimming. I miss yoga. I don't miss running, fuck running, but I miss being able to run I guess? I miss punching my bag. I want to have Korra arms. And I have, quite reasonably, 10-20 lb I could lose before being even close to "danger". (Trust me, I'm a Taurus; we don't diet.)
This is something I can make happen by 01 Jan 2016.
Inhabitable basement [metric: obvious]
Right now the basement is storage, which is part of what basements are for, but mine opens up to my patio (and grill, and fire chimney) and has a nice little area by the windows where friends could sit and drink wine and grill things. I've two drum sets in my basement and my keyboard, all of which I have been missing desperately. (I miss music! I dream about pianos.) My workout area is functional, but not at all welcoming. My laundry area could use some sprucing.
Much of the storage is related to the above, which means I just need to sort it and work through it. A good part, however, is my grandmother's stuff. She finally passed away in August (I am not sure I even mentioned it here; I was too broken by it to do so) and I do not mind storing her things forever but need to go through them and decide which way makes sense.
This is, also, quite doable by 2016, and having those areas back in my life will please me immensely.
Shame room --> Craft room [metric: obvious]
I want to turn my spare bedroom into a crafting room, to house sewing / knitting / beading / anything else I may start doing. Right now it's a shameful repository of clothes-to-be-donated and a few boxes from moving (not original boxes - these were empty boxes that were repacked with "shit i do not want to deal with rn" and hidden).
Plan for the greatroom [metric: having an estimate / loan]
I have plans in my head to redo my entire greatroom, which started with my neverending desire to replace the horribly stained carpet in there and grew into a really, really epic floor plan. I need to get it from my head onto the page, then find a contractor who can give me estimates on time / cost to make it happen. Why not? Houses are investments, and my cafe-bar thing will be incredible.
Work-Life Balance [metric: ???]
I need to prove to myself that I can, in fact, work the kind of job that pushes all of my success buttons without killing myself. The next 3 months will be busy, as always, but not deadly, so it's time to fucking do it. I still don't know how to make a metric for this; maybe I can use success on the other Resolution points, because they won't happen if I continue to use my energy on work.
Mental Peace [metric: ???]
I went back through some journal entries and I've been in a massive depression funk since early 2014. That's too long. It has started to severely affect my health and my job. I need to attack this. I realize depressions don't "go away" but I haven't tried anything really and I at least deserve an effort.
Write Again [metric: get some word count] No real comments. I just miss writing.

I stopped there, since there are really only 3 months left in the year, and they will contain not only the major hols of Halloween, Thanksgiving, and Christmas, but also the birth of my newest niece or nephew, so I'm well aware that this is a lot to do in that time frame. (Obviously they won't need to be complete, but I work better with deadlines, even self-imposed ones. Better to not let myself cheat.)

There. Public posting makes it real, right?

Crossposts: http://first-seventhe.livejournal.com/377993.html

Heyyyooo, so let's talk about fic stuff. Today's post is a small-fandom extravaganza. We'll start with DOINK! 2013!

I got a really awesome gift this year:

Seeing The Bright (1875 words) by Estirose
Chapters: 1/1
Fandom: Final Fantasy II, Final Fantasy III
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Characters: Princess Hilda, Gordon (Final Fantasy II), Leila (Final Fantasy II), Arc (Final Fantasy III)
Summary:
At camp, Hilda gets ready to retake Fynn. But there's a little time before that to rest, talk to her friends, and decide what to make of Leila.

Not only is this a crossover fic (!!!!!!!) that not only includes some of my favorite FFII characters but managed to work in Arc (and Arc/Alus!!!) – points for that alone, ladies and gentlemen; ways to make your Sev happy: surprise crossover references – but it's a beautiful look at Hilda's mindset in the game before they retake Fynn, the way she thinks of her people (not just the people of Fynn she needs to care for, but the people around her she chooses to trust) and her situation. It's gorgeous.

I also received an awesome piece of Chocobo Down:

Don't Talk to Mountains (They Talk Back) (2755 words) by flonnebonne
Chapters: 1/1
Fandom: Final Fantasy IV, Final Fantasy IV: The After Years
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Relationships: Edge Geraldine/Rydia
Characters: Edge Geraldine, Kain Highwind, Rydia, Cecil Harvey, Rosa Joanna Farrell, Ceodore Harvey
Additional Tags: how can anyone spend seventeen years on a mountain, meta disguised as fic, ffiv: the after years makes no sense, edge is silly
Summary:
Edge tries to talk Kain off the mountain and gets an earful of nonsense. After which the story stops even trying to make sense.

I started giggling at the summary, then the first paragraph made me lose it, and I was hooting by the end. This is legitimately one of the funniest fics I've ever read.

I wrote two things for DOINK! this year. My gift was:

Sight (3461 words) by seventhe
Chapters: 1/1
Fandom: Final Fantasy II
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Characters: Minwu, Hilda (Final Fantasy II)
Additional Tags: Hilda/Minwu (implied), gratuitous use of imagery, Backstory
Summary:
Minwu sees things; when he looks at one thing, he sees another, and he has his whole life. But when he looks at Fynn Castle, he sees only its stones; when he looks at Princess Hilda, he doesn't know what he sees.
The story of how Minwu came to serve Hilda, and how they came to trust one another.

I ended up really enjoying this prompt, and really enjoyed writing this fic. There's a lot to be said about the bond between Hilda and Minwu, and I really only approached Minwu's side here, but after

moogle_university I apparently had a lot to say, up to and including a lot of crossover meta fun to throw in there and play with. It is full of references to other FFs! It is a fun game: gotta catch 'em all! I am awful. However, I think I now ship Hilda/Minwu. I'm not sure I'm sorry.

I also wrote a piece of Chocobo Down:

a dancing game (1840 words) by seventhe
Chapters: 1/1
Fandom: Final Fantasy XII
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Author Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Characters: Vaan (Ivalice Alliance), Penelo
Additional Tags: Sky Pirates, Treasure Hunting, effective (if quirky) friendships
Summary:
Penelo and Vaan find yet another trap in search of treasure. Lucky for them, they still dance a mean game.

…which reminded me how much I enjoyed FFXII's battle system, and I am looking forward to getting there in our replay.

And finally, unrelated to DOINK! at all, I also finished and posted another giant thing, for which I will somehow manage to blame

lassarina (for moogle_university),

auronlu (for encouraging me), my friend Phil (for beating FFIII while visiting), and myself (for being a horrible, incorrigible person who likes terrible ships):

Architecture (12208 words) by seventhe
Chapters: 1/1
Fandom: Final Fantasy III
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Author Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Relationships: Alus/Arc
Characters: Arc (Final Fantasy III), Alus Restor
Additional Tags: Period-Typical Underage, Aged-Up Character(s), aged up from canon, precocious boy-kings, shy trusted advisors, clumsy boy makeouts, Kissing
Series: Part 2 of precocious boy-kings and their shy trusted advisors
Summary:
(+5 years from the game; sequel to Calligraphy.) Arc finds new direction in Saronia, new understanding of himself, and new everything with Alus. (In which Arc builds a bridge, Alus hires an advisor, and Luneth, Refia, and Ingus write letters.)

…because I cannot stop writing Arc/Alus and I never will and I am not sorry, so here are 12000 words of it, that and FFIII worldbuilding and continued Refia/airships and Luneth/pranks and Ingus/Sara (who actually have the best sense of humor of all of them) and Arc and Alus and trust and friendship and horrible budget committee meetings and clandestine meetings in the library (except not) and falling asleep on couches, and I will never stop having things to say about shy, awkward, kids; about clever, brilliant precocious young boys who are strong in ways that aren't traditional; and the ways they can find confidence and belonging and also make out a lot. It is like my thing for Larsa only much much worse. /DEFRIENDED

It's a direct sequel to Calligraphy, but it seemed to need to stand on its own; I'm so happy with a lot of what I wrote this month, but I'm so so very happy about this one.

I ALSO have finally found the actual Rosa fic that I have been meaning to finish and edit and post - the third part of my polyamorous trifecta, Momentum / Content With This Winter / [All The Ghosts] - and so even though I haven't really had time yet to make educated comments on

sathari's Rosa entry I am jazzed beyond belief that I didn't lose the fic entirely like I thought.

I GUESS I HAVE BROKEN THROUGH WRITER'S BLOCK, GUYS?

So my 12 Days of Promptmas was either a roaring success or massive failure depending on how you look at it, and it's your fault: YOU ALL KNOW ME TOO WELL. The thing is, every single one of these prompts that I have tried to write (to date, 8 of them, not even lying) has erupted into a fic well over 1000 words and none of them show any signs of stopping. Success! AND FAILURE. Apparently my brain wants long and introspective fics right now.

So rather than stomping on that, what I'm going to do is try to write everyone a short drabble or scene by Thursday, so that everybody gets a thing by my self-imposed deadline. Then I will take the next few weeks and try to beat some of the longer things into the shape of actual stories. That way I can encourage all the words, without feeling guilty! EVERYONE WINS.

(Seriously. One of these is 7000 words already and all that has happened is a lot of snarking and someone making spaghetti. YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE)

So I guess if you didn't have a chance to leave me a prompt for promptmas, GO FOR IT. Why not!

I still really want to do a trial of SevMas, but it's hard to break up my own writing mojo to do so. Stay tuned, though! Maybe it can start soon. :D

WHY DID I NEVER GET INTO COWBOY BEBOP FANDOM AT ALL

ALSO WHY IS THE SHOW STILL SO GOOD

IS THERE ANYTHING GOOD OUT THERE IN THE FANDOM OR WILL I ONLY BE DISAPPOINT

Crossposts: http://first-seventhe.livejournal.com/300087.html

I took this from

owlmoose because it looks interesting:

Pick a character I write, and I will give you the top five ideas/concepts/other I keep in mind while writing that character that I believe are essential to depicting them accurately.

justira asked:
Why are you in fandom! How did you get here! Did you learn anything about yourself from/through being in fandom? For example, did you discover any kinks? =D (And, if you feel comfortable sharing, what are they!)

And I've got a bit to say about this!

Why am I in fandom?
I like to write, and being in fandom helps keep me doing so; there's an audience in fandom I think it's easier to reach out to than with original work. I love the source material, and fandom's a way to express that: reading, browsing art, commenting, sharing; all of these are ways to extend and explore a source material I'm fond of. I like the community; I've met some amazing people through fandom (more on this in a bit) and I enjoy the shared/collaborative feel of it, even if it's just commenting on a friend's drabble with a smiley-face.

I think in a way it's about value. I've watched people change fandoms or drift in and out of fandom because it isn't returning what they value (whether that's attention, comments/reviews, crit/feedback, cult of worshipers etc - value's different for all), and obviously I encourage everyone to shift around until they find a place in a fandom that's rewarding for them. Fandom's supposed to be fun, not frustrating!

Anyway: for me, the value returned is in communications: friends emailing me rambling snippets of fic or ideas for the one where GFs steal Seifer's memory or even just handfuls of porn, people I don't know commenting on fic that's two years old and getting into conversations about this or that pairing, friendships that move on beyond fandom, ideas that grow into

ff_exchange or the Kiss Battle or a series of prompts on

fuckyeahfinalfantasy -- interactions that go beyond "hay I liked your fic" are what I mean.

It's the connections, the kind of stuff I wouldn't do on my own -- like... I could write and maybe get comments and stuff, but -- I know now that I can write something and people will read it, and if they don't I can send them a note and they'll read it when they have time; it's the feedback, the interaction, and that's what I like.

How did I come to fandom?
Sadface: I have been writing fanfiction since before I knew what it was. Remember Sev is older than most of you, and we didn't have a ton of internet access/time growing up, and so when I spent my time writing an absolutely massive (note: it spanned four 3 1/2 inch disks) FFIV / FFVI crossover, I DIDN'T KNOW IT WAS FANFIC; I was just like "la de da I am writing this stupid story and I will never tell anyone." It wasn't until college - which for me was after 2000 - that I really recognized fanfiction and figured out what the heck it was. That means I've been writing for over 10 years... wow, that's ridiculous.

Once I found fanfiction.net -- through FF and Harry Potter almost simultaneously -- I started writing more, and I started meeting people. I ended up heading to Livejournal through - well, a collection of people;

novel_machinist/

drakonlily and

crankyoldman/

venefica_aura, mostly. They! Were also the first fandom people I ever met, in 2005, when we went to Otakon for the first time. (2005 or 2006? Am I that old...?)

Once I found Livejournal I was pretty much lost.

Things I learned from fandom!

Well, to start it off I have to say that fandom has impacted my life. It isn't subtle. Many people I've met from here have become friends, and some of them not just friends but CLOSE, heart-to-heart, soulmate friends. (And some of them, MAKEOUT FRIENDS, which in my opinion are totally the best kind!) I'm talking real-life friends and real-life impact. I won't get sappy, but I'm going to say: I love you all.

And, GOSH, as for kinks?

( KINKS! )

And my time's almost up... post! Obviously there's a lot more to say, but one thing I learned about myself is tl;dr. Yes.

This is part of my 30 Days of Posting meme - feel free to check out the schedule of posting! My month is full, but if any of the posts make you want to ask for something else, go ahead and leave a comment anyway! DW || LJ

SQUALL, SWEETHEART, IT GETS WORSE

So! FFVIII fans:

( questions on Laguna, Squall, Ellone; cut for pretty obvious but still-existing spoilers )

megaflare_ff

Rules and Sign-Ups!

!!!!!!!!!!!! WHO ELSE IS EXCITED.

FYI, I will be writing the sequel to Dissolution (titled Reinvention). If anybody wants to be my artist this is the chance to draw Edgar/Sabin twincest I KNOW you've been waiting for. ;)

Recap of the weekend in a bit. Had to get this out first ♥

So I’ve been pretty stressed out lately. Rather than talk too much about the things stressing me, I’m going to talk about the good things that are happening because of all the stress, one by one.

Snafubar played our first gig on Saturday night. We shared a show with Lithium and I thought it went really well overall. I was pleased with the way we sounded although as always you can critique these kinds of things until the sun goes down… but in the end, not only am I happy about it, I’m happy to have it over with. I didn’t have a lot of practice time in my week to begin with (and now with all the other stress it really wasn’t helping) and while I love playing it’s nice to have a little break. One stressor down. Congrats to Lithium too, you guys sounded awesome. :D

FFEX, NGP, help_haiti: all assorted fandom projects with assorted due dates that are approximately NOW, or maybe YESTERDAY, if not LAST WEEK DUMBASS: but all of which will be done this week and I’m pleased as shit with things right now. Even if my contributions to FFEX have been “cheer wildly while coding people make my dreams come true” and “panic”… even then.

Work has been insanely ungodly busy and while I'm trying to pull something good out of it for the list… I’m coming up blank. Right now I’m working on the largest single amount of polymer I’ve ever made for a request, times four requests. Plus a crapload of other studies and other smaller batches which are still my responsibility no matter what else lands in my lap. Due dates for one major project/study is mid-April; for another project/request, mid-May. So right now is crunch time. At least I’m busy, job security, etc. It isn’t helping the exhaustion but I guess it’s helping the days go by.

Health-wise: I got the results back from a blood test I took a few weeks ago (seriously, people, I have had 8 appointments in the past 3 Fridays. I don’t even want to look at my medical bills yet). Apparently I am extremely vitamin deficient in a way that isn’t related to diet or sun exposure at all: good job, body, way to continue to fail at the things other people do correctly. XDD I’m lacking Bs and Ds, I guess: vitamin D you hear about a lot in the winter, but B12 is one that contributes to “normal brain function”. Ha ha ha. Funny. I wasn’t really sure why, because I buy my own groceries and cook for myself and eat lots of fruit and vegetables. But apparently this is the kind of thing that can just happen; my body just doesn’t absorb or process or hang onto this stuff correctly, apparently, sez the doc, and that’s that. YEY.
The thing is, the symptoms (not just lethargy/lack of energy/exhaustion/sleep disorder, but depression, anxiety, irritability, mood-swings*) match the things I’ve been fighting, the things that have been getting worse. The revelation that the B-vitamins affect mental issues and brain function kind of just made it click for me. Hilariously, when I called my mother to tell her this, she revealed that a great-aunt of mine had once been hospitalized in a psych ward for symptoms that ended up being related to B-deficiency. Guess I’m glad we caught this now.
So I am on a regimen of shots, weekly supervitamin gutpunches, and pill cocktails for a month; after that I have a delicious sampling of 8 pills I’ll take every day (not including the multi-vitamin I’m holding off on for now until this other shit gets stabilized) until I get re-tested in three months for APPROVE/DISAPPROVE. The reason I'm taking 8 pills / day is because the levels of daily vitamins I was prescribed by the doctor are 2-3x the largest size sold in any given pharmacy. Sweet.
Honestly, this is better than the outcome I was expecting and stressing over (“Your thyroid is borked! You require surgery/serious meds”) and I’m hoping, hoping, hoping that some of my health issues will get their asses in line once I get myself and my internal systems re-balanced.

In-between appointments this week, I wasted some time at a Borders which was going out of business and had discounts on their books. I bought myself a lovely illustrated book on Yoga; it’s hard to find a good book on yoga, because what I really want is a book about building vinyasas for myself, and I’m guessing the discount shelves aren’t the best place to find something that specific. But the book I have has a lot of awesome 360-degree photos of some of the main poses, and combinations to do for pain in certain areas of the body, which is pretty cool: I’m pleased, even if it doesn’t cover everything I was hoping it would. I also got a book on homemade spa treatments (which looks really awesome and fun; can’t wait to try it). And also: I found The deck of Tarot** cards for me. I’ve been looking for a new deck for a while, and who would’ve known the perfect deck lived in the Borders clearance bin? Ha: I should have, as my “inner self” is a cheapass. I haven’t gotten to do much with them yet because I’ve been so busy, but they are beautiful and awesome, the symbolism is fantastic (very faerie-based, beautiful yet with enough creepy to really please me), and this is the first deck since my last one that I have really felt intrigued by. Yoga and Tarot… rebalancing vitamin regimen… who senses a theme? Haha, self!

My training plan is going as well as it can. I did my first two outdoor runs this weekend: one 5-miler, and one ~3-miler. My training plan basically has one long run per week, and as long as the temperature isn’t cold enough to trigger my asthma I really want to start doing the long run outdoors. However, I have to find a better road to run on! The path I picked on Friday was a really shit road for running. Anyway, my legs are still recovering from the shock of a real road, but I’m getting there. Training is slow, but I’m getting there.

Anyway, my commitment plate has been a little full, but this week – this week! – a lot of it should get better, and maybe I can get this stress-knot out of my neck and this anxiety out of my gut and this exhaustion out of my head. :) I’m looking forward to this weekend if nothing else! Engineering Bitches hit WineCon 2010. Heeeellllllllllls yeah.

How is everyone else!

* Uh, I guess this is the part where I mention that I’ve been going through a lot of these symptoms lately and having some health and mental health issues…? Heh.
** I like the Tarot as a meditation/therapy/interesting-way-of-looking-at-things tool, much like I like horoscopes. Do I think there is a spirit in the cards (or the stars) telling my fortune? No. Do I believe someone like me (who fails at emotional analysis anyway) can use Tarot methods to better understand who they are, how they feel about situations and what they want to do? Yup. Do I like pretty cards with gorgeous illustrations? Also yes. :P

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Entries tagged with writing

GYWO 2022 and How I Fucked Up

wording out: when you can't write (1/?) - chronic fatigue

on writing, again

2020: Words

working from home

Commissions Update!

Fanfic Commissions

2018 WRITING GOALS

some thoughts on Rosigo

hey look, a new thing

Idle Question...

new year's resolutions done backwards, aka The Sev Way

I write things; I read things

TWO IMPORTANT THINGS OF NOTE. NO I MEAN THREE.

funtimes

[30Days]: On Fandom!

HONK OUR LIVES

i post about very useless things sometimes

important FF things I missed while drinking with the Dutch and the Finnish

and i'll keep kicking the crap till it's gone