the trick is to keep breathing

Since I stopped posting this meme:

• I have successfully posted the first 4 chapters (aka 40,000 words) of HONK. You can find it on the AO3, which is a much nicer interface, BUT we would also appreciate comments on the fanfiction.net version if you'd like to help us out there. AO3 has 1-4, ff.net currently has 1-2. Even if you've read the AO3 version, please help a sister out and drop us a comment in either place. ♥


• I've taken one exam, done two major homework assignments, and have a final next week.


• Work has flipped on me entirely.


• Goldbug's exhaust broke, to the tune of a Check Engine light and $700 (WITH DISCOUNT), which didn't help my stress levels


• I hosted a very successful SevCon at my new townhouse. APPA!!! HOOKAH. HONK. WALKING RUCKUS = IT'S THE POLICE Etc. It cost some money, too, but it was pretty awesome overall. MUST HAVE MORE?


• I found out Marzy has a heart murmur and has to go to a kitty cardiologist, to the tune of what will eventually be $500.


• I've watched Seasons 1 and 2 of Avatar: The Last Airbender and while I love it, I am not sure I want to dive into the fandom because it terrifies me. However: MUST. COSPLAY. KATARA.


• Goldbug's exhaust then broke again on the way to Buffalo, and was fixed after some angry-panicked-furious phone calls over three states. Should have been $360, was discounted down to $160. Still sucked.


• I spent Thanksgiving with family and friends, a lovely de-stressor...


• ...only to return to OH with an infection which blossomed into a fever, leaving me on a damn serious antibiotic (let us all now remember Sev's completely idiosynchratic reactions to antibiotics; the last two gave me more infections, face herpes, a rash / hives, and also would uncontrollably knock me out for 2 hours at a time - so far this one makes me woozy and also allows me to feel my kidneys, throbbing at me, which isn't very reassuring) that scares me...


• ...and the stress of all the proceeding tied up my neck in one of those I-can't-turn-my-head-at-all literal knots, which also prevented me from getting to the doctor (or work) (or anywhere) and made medical treatment pretty miserable.


• I haven't been to the gym, or yoga, in weeks, mainly because of the above.


• And I'm depressed about it all.

It is now December 2nd. I am still writing Honk, I am still studying for a final, I am still treating my cats and I also now have the holidays to worry about. I really apologize for dropping this meme, but this has been a seriously rough time.

BUT! Let's all go read some HONK and I'll start the meme back up officially, starting now. :D

♥

Well, this post starts out in an interesting manner: jennyclarinet asked me to talk about being legally blind.

TW, if it is needed, for discussion about blindness, eyesight, and related disability.

Here's the background: my eyesight is very, very bad. I've had glasses since I was three years old. My eyes, now, at 28, are reaching the point where they're no longer 100% correctable. Since I've had glasses for so long, I barely even remember the discussions that went on when I was 3, but I do know I am functionally blind without my glasses. I am "severely sight impaired." And, somewhere in those 28 years, I was told this was "legally blind."

So I went to Wikipedia and looked up the borderline for being legally blind, to talk about it a little bit, and I am now confused, because - while I've been told that I qualify on the ground that my eyesight is so poor, I do not qualify according to the line drawn on Wikipedia because my eyes are (mostly) correctable. So, hilariously, which is right? Is it the natural state of my eyes which counts, or the state of my eyes after correction...? Which doctor told me I was legally blind, and was that a state definition, or a doctor somehow projecting on a young patient? Was it right at the time? Is Wikipedia correct in this case? Do I actually qualify as legally blind?

Obviously, these are all questions to ask my NEW optometrist; I am not qualified to answer them. But it made me think a little, and I want to throw these thoughts out there. It made me think, because I don't want to look like that person appropriating labels and intruding on legitimate space for the fellow disabled. I don't want to lie. I am not looking for attention, or for sympathy.

So who gets to decide if I am disabled? And does it matter?

I feel disabled. Am I? Does that count?

Hilarious Edit: I think thewhitemage has clarified my confusion for me: the "legal" definition is what you need to get benefits, which is why correctability matters; to qualify in the medical category, correctability is irrelevant. So... perhaps everything is correct here!
Oncoming rant still stands though. *g*

( Discussion of Disability. )

( And now, more discussion about my eyesight! )

( And my worries about my own eyes. )

It kind of goes along with my strange relationship with my own body; it doesn't work right, and I am not sure I love that. And it goes along with my own struggles with and desires for medical "legitimacy", as if I'm not allowed to claim something unless it's an actual diagnosed medical problem? As if having this awful eyesight isn't enough, it has to be labeled "Legally Blind" or I feel like I should just STFU about it?

Anyway, yup.

I have pretty much decided that I am going in early next year to be evaluated for laser eye surgery. So anyone who has any thoughts on that, they're much appreciated.

This is part of my 30 Days of Posting meme - feel free to check out the schedule of posting! My month is full, but if any of the posts make you want to ask for something else, go ahead and leave a comment anyway! DW || LJ

So: THE SQWHALE.

HERE HE IS AGAIN FOR YOUR ENJOYMENT.



( SO. IT WAS LIKE 3 AM. )

Conclusion: Squids are assholes.

This is part of my 30 Days of Posting meme - feel free to check out the schedule of posting! My month is full, but if any of the posts make you want to ask for something else, go ahead and leave a comment anyway! DW || LJ

Makeup Batman's Beauty Tips!

GOSH THIS IS A FUN ONE.

Okay, full disclosure: I love makeup.

( On Makeup and Style )

If you've ever been to a con with me, you've probably seen the Makeup Batman in action. I love con makeup because it's dramatic and fun and a chance to hit everyone with dark bright colors and glitter. But I also love doing everyone's makeup for just normal fun weekends. In spending more time on my own and in doing other people up, I've gathered some general know-how, and I will now talk about it in some semblance of order!

( Hey Makeup Batman: How Much Should I Spend? )

( Hey Makeup Batman: What Should I Get? )

( Hey Makeup Batman: What Colors Do I Want? )

( Hey Makeup Batman: WTF Do I Do With This Stuff? )

AND THAT'S ABOUT IT FOR NOW

WHY IS THIS SO LONG, LOLOLFOREVER

This is part of my 30 Days of Posting meme - feel free to check out the schedule of posting! My month is full, but if any of the posts make you want to ask for something else, go ahead and leave a comment anyway! DW || LJ

A Day In Sevland: What The World Would Be Like If Sev Were Queen

Here’s what the world would be like if I were queen: kittens. Everywhere. Kittens would basically never grow up to be cats, or if they did, the cats would be cuter. And there wouldn’t any such thing as a cat allergy, so everybody would basically love all the cats. People who didn’t love kittens could have corgis. Basically, my world will be a giant humane society.

Here’s what else there would be: BEER. Like, a fuckton of beer. There would be beer everywhere. You’d pay for your house to be hooked up to the Yuengling line, kind of like the internet, and then there’d just be a tap in your house with beer. Everywhere. People who don’t like beer? You can subscribe to the Vodkaline.

There would be a similar thing, but with coffee.

Douchebaggery would be a federal offense, and I – since I am queen – would get to vet all of the people who determine whether or not someone falls into the category of douchebaggery or one of its many subsets (example: asshattery). Your punishment for being a douche would be scooping the giant litterboxes of my kitten-infested world. Nothing capital, but enough to make you think twice before you’re mean to somebody.

There will be a Sheetz on every corner. They will play only Pitbull, Boulevard of the Allies, or the Ceiling Cake song.

I will create a giant federal grant for the writing of all kinds of fanfiction (and the drawing of fanarts!). Applicants will send me their best porn, and if you pass, you can earn up to a year’s worth of sabbatical on Fandom Island, where you will do nothing but play games and write (porn) about them all day long, except for the hours you are petting kittens.

Everyone will know how to sing and the world will randomly break out in four-part harmony.

Freshly-baked bread will be the backbone of my nation. Somehow it will supply everyone with your vitamins and minerals and proteins and fats and carbs in the correct balance, and it will taste like fresh French baguettes. You may have jam if you would like. Sev is a benevolent queen.

It will be not only okay, but encouraged, for each house or apartment to have a small alcove off of it devoted entirely to shoes. (And boots!)

Instead of war, SevLand will spend money making the rest of the world love the fuck out of us. We will finance growth and development and Blackberries and Sheetz and love for all in nations that need it. Everyone in SevLand who wants to will be able to spend a year, fully subsidized, doing community service either in or outside SevLand. This way nobody will ever want to bomb us. I think it’s a good national security strategy. I am queen, you know.

Obviously nobody’s going to want to bomb kittens.

Tons of money is going to go into the scientific community, because they’re the ones who are going to make us beer taps and delicious bread and cure cancer. There will be lots of scientific jobs and universities will actually make fucking sense. There won’t be any politicians because I am queen for life. Anyone who wants to enter politics can make a “donation” to this fund and spend the rest of their life on Politics Island, the place Fandom Island goes in cosplay / furry suits to fuck with.

Shemar Moore will be my sexytimes partner. (What! WHAT.)

There will be books everywhere. And everyone can write them! And read them. If you don’t know how to read by the age of 5 you can come to my spacious shoe-kitten-beer-brothel-brewery palace, and I – or one of my friends - will personally teach you to read.

TV won't have any ads. All of the shows will kick ass and pass the Bechdel Test.


Yup.

It would be awesome.

This is part of my 30 Days of Posting meme - feel free to check out the schedule of posting! My month is full, but if any of the posts make you want to ask for something else, go ahead and leave a comment anyway! DW || LJ

renay has asked me to talk about books, and since I sent her some of this particular series (ACCIDENTALLY COVERED IN CHOCOLATE, that will never stop being funny) and she hasn't had time for them yet, today I am going to talk about: The Dresden Files.

I do love this series and I enjoy these books very much, but let me get out there first that I am definitely not the kind of reader who lets books I like get a free pass. I actually enjoy critiquing books I like. Sunshine, aka my favorite book of all time? SOOO not a perfect book; and one of my favorite things about it is being able to discuss its flaws with other people, discussing how it works with them and around them. So! If you also like the Dresden Files but you don't want to see them discussed from all angles (strengths AND weaknesses), uhhhhhh this is so officially your warning. If you're curious about the Dresden Files and you'd like to see my take on where they succeed and where they fail, hey: this is your invitation!

Note: There should be no major spoilers in this part. If I end up wanting to write about something that's a spoiler, I will mark it!

( Hell's bells! )

( Let's take a look from a different angle. )

In The End

This post is too long, and I know I've left out a ton, so feel free to ask stuff in the comments. Overall: I have really enjoyed this series, with its flaws, because the storytelling is engaging, the characters intriguing, and the world-building excellently complex.

AND NOW I POST.

This is part of my 30 Days of Posting meme - feel free to check out the schedule of posting and contribute if there are any spaces! DW || LJ

So I have three cats. Let me get this out there first: I love cats. I have always loved cats; I love dogs too - I don't think you have to like one or the other; some people do but there are plenty of us who like both - but my lifestyle isn't really appropriate for a dog. I work 10-hour days and I'm already out of the house for 11.5 hours straight because of it; add in grad school, the gym, and the errands it takes to be a damn adult, and it's easy for me to be out of the house for 14 hours. That's only an average day. That isn't fair to do to any dog - dogs take a lot of commitment and responsibility (to get a good dog, anyway) and that just isn't feasible. So, I have three cats.

I love my cats.

I love cats in general. They are affectionate and friendly, but not clingy or needy - just like me. They want things when they want them and no one can really convince them otherwise, unless it's food - just like me. They actually need space and alone time and will be sure to get it whenever necessary - just like me. They are fuzzy and cute and make adorable noises, which I am not and don't, but hey, a girl can't do everything.

I love pets and I talk to mine all the time, like people. Because I come from crazystock, the cats talk back (yes, they all have 'voices'). They all have personalities, they all have habits, and they all have places in my heart.

( So these are my cats. Lots of photos, guys, made small for easy access! )

I know my photos are old -- I think they max out at 6 months, and they are so much bigger now; I want to take a video (HAPPY KITTY VIDEO, Y/Y?) and even if I can't I'll try to get some of the photos off of my phone so that you can at least see how freaking gigantic the kittens are now. WHY DO KITTENS GROW. :(

They're small and cute and so very adorably MINE, and I am so very glad that I can provide a good home to three cats who really needed it. "Cat dreams do some true" is what Jeff and I say to them, and it's so very true. They are the luckiest fuckers in the entire world.

And those are my cats!

EDIT: I came upstairs after reading this post, and Marzy had knocked every single bottle of vitamins off of my dresser and onto the ground (that's like 5 bottles) and Porter was sleeping in a laundry basket. That should tell you everything you need to know.

This is part of my 30 Days of Posting meme - feel free to check out the schedule of posting and contribute if there are any spaces! DW || LJ