the trick is to keep breathing

I have really mixed feelings about the holidays. I generally enjoy them - somebody who likes sparkly lights, glittery shit, and slightly gaudy decorations as much as I do will always be partial to secular Christmas - hols with my family are a crazy, fun, over-the-top drunken bacchanalia of good feelings like love and nostalgia and being completely hammered. Overall it's a positive experience -- we've figured out a good balance between the gracious, graceful, good-feelings side of gift-giving without straying too much into commercial consumerism or ungrateful demanding, and we have fun with it, which is valuable, and pretty awesome.

But it's also just hard for me. Any season this intense is going to be difficult on my introverted, homebody self: traveling, socializing, family events, people everywhere when all you want to do is go to the grocery and buy some fucking milk, parking lots full and idiots behind the wheel, crowds, noise: overstimulation, excess, a feeling of community that's forced and frustrating. It wears me down. Doesn't help that it's another thing my family gets very into, and while I get into it as much as I can, I often don't have the reserves to engage at the level they do for the length of time and the extent they do, and it's another example of just not being able to keep up with my family on a purely social level. I need breaks from it all. Overstimulation is exhausting and it's bad for me.

Plus traveling and extended family and stuff that should be fun but ends up feeling like a chore: story of the season.

This has been a hard run for me, the end of this year. I'm just exhausted. I've taken a couple days to just be at home in my apartment alone with my cats and the snow, so that I can hopefully recharge my batteries enough to make it through the upcoming bits in a good way rather than a bad way. It's snowing and I have almost all my gifts ready to go and I'm lounging around with coffee and in a bathrobe trying to relax and find some kind of christmas spirit.

Happy hols, everybody.

Alive! Back in Akron! Full of delicious pumpkin pie and a fantastic feeling of happiness, general contentment with life, and holiday cheer, which has been encouraged by delightful Yuletide fic and does not dim in the slightest at the terrible prospect of a full work-day tomorrow.

I fear I should be watching the stove, rather than writing this.

Love to all. More tomorrow. Missed you. How is life?

It's almost Christmastime! *dances* Two days of work left. HELL FUCK YES.

More later.

Hey guys, it's that holiday time again. Y'all know how much I love Christmas and the holidays season in general, so this is for any of you, whether you celebrate anything or not - or if you just want gifties. These are for you guys! Feel free to ask for anything! including hot sex! I had a couple different ideas spurred by different discussions, so - that's why the post is so damn long.

Giftie Number One: Fic Request

Simple. Request a fic. Ask for whatever you'd like. Fun, OTPs, crack you wish existed, AUs, anything.

Give me the following information:

Fandom (I will write for Final Fantasy IV, V, VI, VII, VIII, IX, X, X-2. I am no good with FFVII canon past AC. Also will do crossovers.)

Characters or pairing (I have no problem with het, slash, femme, crack, or genfic and character studies - just be kind XD)

Situation / Prompt / Genre (By this I mean: Do you want smut? Do you want happy fluff? Snark? Humour? Angst? Crack? Plot? No Plot? Bananas? Would you like fries with that?)

I'll write you something about 1000 words (probably over, knowing me) fulfilling your request. The writing will take place during January, probably, and I'm a first-come, first-served woman.

Giftie Number Two: Feedback Request

This is something I came up with after discussions with bottle_of_shine and lassarina. There's a lot of talk about feedback and concrit in this fandom, and where it is and how to get it. So one of the other things I'll be volunteering to do is deliver comments / feedback / beta-ing / concrit. I'm talking everything from grammar/structure to characterization and mood -- whatever you'd like, I'll do my best to deliver on.

My fandoms are listed above - I'm pretty dorkily anal on all of them (except maaaaaybe V). I will also review original!fic (although I would ask that you don't throw me in the middle of your NaNoWriMo-verse, at least without warning - i.e., short plz.). If you'd like some thorough concrit on something in December/January - long, short, a series of drabbles, a bunch of chapters, one thing, many things - I'm available. This can be my Christmas gift to you. Also, if you know someone who doesn't know me but has been looking for concrit - send them my way! I'm willing to share the holiday love with strangers.

This request is meant for people looking to get actual concrit and feedback. If you're looking for brainless praise - well, if that's what you really want for the holidays, I can give you that, but please - serious requesters only.

Gifties for me

I've seen this going around as a semi-fandom-meme -- what would you like to see for Christmas? Well, since I am selfish and love gifts as well, I've got a couple lists. The first is fic I'd love to receive as a gift. The second is fic I'm dying to write, and if it tickles your fancy, why not request it and give me an excuse. (You'll notice the two lists coincide occasionally, hee!)

( Fic I would love to see )

( Fic I would love to write )

So. Feel free to request anything you want - I'm putting no limit on it for now, but remember that I am not entirely made of internets. If you've got a wishlist of your own and you'd like to just link me to that, leave it in a comment.