eh, what the hell

[seventhe]

or: Sev's Adventures With ChatGPT

This is not an article defending AI scraping programs in any way. I find their existence worrisome and exploitative. However, while reading what's going down at AO3 with regards to AI-generated fanworks - more specifically, writing - I realized I actually don't know a lot about what these kinds of things actually produce.

I am, of course, teh lady who thought the band was actually called One Directional, so. No wonder.

But I decided I would take a little look and see what the concerns are with regards to written fanworks. (Again, this is in NO way defending the way these programs were trained on the backs of content written by others. That's separate.) I wanted to see what a fanwork might look like coming out of one of these guys.

I wanted to see how - threatening? - AI-generated content is at the moment only in terms of comparison to other fanfictions. Again, this says nothing about legal use or existence as a transformative work. I wanted to see if I could make it make me a fanfiction.

So if you, too, were curious about it, but didn't want to use the AI guy / were too lazy to do so, here's my short 15 minute experiment.

I figured I'd start somewhere I've been a while: Winterhawk fandom. So I said:

Help me write a story where Bucky Barnes and Clint Barton get together while working at a restaurant and eventually kiss.

You might recognize this premise from the garlic fic.

-- In a bustling city, Bucky Barnes and Clint Barton found themselves working side by side at a charming little restaurant called "Savor". Bucky, with his brooding demeanor and impeccable cooking skills, was the head chef. Clint, a witty and charismatic waiter, quickly became a favorite among the customers.

As they spent more time together, their camaraderie grew stronger. Bucky admired Clint's ability to make everyone smile, while Clint was captivated by Bucky's quiet strength. Their friendship flourished amidst the tantalizing aromas and lively atmosphere of the restaurant.

One evening, during a particularly hectic dinner rush, Bucky accidentally bumped into Clint in the crowded kitchen. Their eyes met, and time seemed to stand still for a moment. In that instant, they realized there was something more between them.

After the shift, Bucky and Clint found themselves lingering by the restaurant's back entrance, away from prying eyes. In the soft glow of the moonlight, they confessed their feelings, their voices blending with the sounds of laughter and clinking glasses from inside.

As the days turned into weeks, their connection deepened. Bucky would steal glances at Clint as he served tables, and Clint would blush whenever their hands brushed while exchanging orders. The air crackled with unspoken tension, and their fellow coworkers couldn't help but notice.

One evening, as they closed up the restaurant together, Bucky mustered up the courage to take a leap of faith. He gently cupped Clint's cheek and leaned in, their lips meeting in a tender and passionate kiss. The world around them faded away, leaving only the warmth and electricity of their embrace.

From that moment on, Bucky and Clint's love story continued to blossom. Their coworkers and customers alike witnessed their shared laughter, stolen glances, and stolen kisses. The restaurant became a sanctuary for their love, a place where their hearts and dreams intertwined.

So on one hand, I was expecting the writing to be terrible, and it isn't. But this reads more like the summary of a story than an actual story, right? Plus, the phrasings are ultimately cliche: the soft glow of the moonlight is easily predictable text because it's been used thousands of times. This isn't bad, but it isn't something I see as being at all popular over other fic offerings.

But, I thought, maybe I'm using it wrong. So I made the sacrifice and put in the first 3 paragraphs of Old Vines. Yes, ChatGPT now has the first 3 paragraphs of Old Vines in its database. I'm sorry / You're welcome.

So the first three paragraphs read:

Aziraphale settles into his first-class seat with an audible sigh. Oh, but he truly hates flying; the hassle of it, all of the bustle and the people and the rules! — as if he’s supposed to be able to pack his toilette in a carry-on for a six-month business endeavor! Three ounces, absolutely not. It’s become ridiculous. Plus, the Los Angeles airport is just ...despicable. Too large, too busy, too... too much. Then again, that applies to most of LA, by Aziraphale’s standards; he doesn’t often admit that he misses the calm of his old life in London, but the feeling’s still there.

He glances over to watch Warlock settle into his own seat. Warlock has traveled with him before, but he’s new to this first class deal - courtesy of the Food and Travel Adventures corporation, their new benefactor - and Aziraphale can at least enjoy the way Warlock grins at the seating and the space and the water bottle that’s been left for them. Back when Aziraphale and Warlock were doing this on their own, they flew coach on lines like the absolutely traitorous Delta; now, here they are, being offered a warm lemon towel and their choice of the drink menu.

Although - Aziraphale pauses - he’s probably wrong in that assumption; it’s highly likely that Warlock has traveled first class before, in the life he had before he became Aziraphale’s, well, employee. Well, it’s the first time Warlock has flown first class with Aziraphale, at least.

And here's what ChatGPT gave me back:

Aziraphale hates flying and finds it cumbersome, with all the bustling, people, and rules. He dislikes the restrictions on carry-on items and finds the Los Angeles airport unpleasantly large and busy. He occasionally misses the tranquility of his previous life in London.

Warlock, who is new to first class, seems delighted with the spacious seating and amenities provided by their benefactor, the Food and Travel Adventures corporation. Previously, Aziraphale and Warlock traveled in coach, but now they are enjoying the perks of first class, such as warm towels and a selection of drinks.

Aziraphale acknowledges that his assumption about Warlock's previous experience may be incorrect, as Warlock might have traveled first class before becoming Aziraphale's employee. However, it is their first time flying first class together.

It's basically... a summary of the first three paragraphs. Rewritten.

So I put in the 4th paragraph.

Mine:

Aziraphale takes a moment to wonder what Warlock puts on those business cards he orders for himself. What’s the proper term: Editor? Manager? Personal Assistant? Aziraphale isn’t even sure he knows. What he can say is that Warlock Dowling has been earning his (recently bumped) salary and then some, these days. He’s so incredibly lucky this young man has decided to hitch his star onto A.Z. Fell’s rising popularity. There’s no way Aziraphale would be able to manage all of this nonsense on his own.

ChatGPTs:

Aziraphale ponders over the title Warlock uses on his business cards, unsure of the appropriate term—Editor, Manager, or Personal Assistant. Regardless, Warlock has proven to be invaluable and has exceeded expectations in his role. Aziraphale considers himself fortunate to have Warlock by his side, benefiting from his capabilities and dedication. With Warlock's assistance, Aziraphale can navigate the increasing demands and responsibilities that come with his growing popularity as A.Z. Fell. He acknowledges that managing everything alone would be overwhelming.

Again. It's just rewriting my words.

So then I asked it:

what happens when Aziraphale lands in wine country

mainly because I was curious whether it would find Old Vines itself somewhere, or like, idk. I was just curious.

And I got:

-- When Aziraphale lands in wine country, he feels a sense of relief and anticipation. The lush landscapes, picturesque vineyards, and serene atmosphere provide a welcome change from the bustling city life. As he steps off the plane, Aziraphale can already imagine the delightful aromas of grapes and the promise of exquisite wine tasting experiences.

Aziraphale's first order of business is to check into his accommodations, likely a charming inn or a cozy vineyard cottage. He takes pleasure in the tranquility and beauty of the wine country surroundings, finding solace in the peacefulness that contrasts with his usual hectic schedule.

Next, Aziraphale immerses himself in the wine culture, exploring renowned wineries and attending tastings. He engages with winemakers, eager to learn about their craft and the nuances of each varietal. Aziraphale takes pleasure in savoring the flavors, appreciating the artistry and dedication that goes into producing fine wines.

Additionally, Aziraphale indulges in the local cuisine, pairing delectable dishes with the perfect wine selections. He enjoys leisurely meals at vineyard restaurants, appreciating the culinary expertise and the harmonious combination of flavors.

During his time in wine country, Aziraphale also takes opportunities to relax and rejuvenate. He might stroll through vineyard trails, basking in the scenic beauty, or unwind with a good book while sipping a glass of wine in a tranquil garden. The peaceful atmosphere allows him to recharge and find moments of serenity amidst his usually busy life.

Overall, Aziraphale's time in wine country is a retreat from the chaos and a chance to indulge in the pleasures of wine, food, and the picturesque surroundings. It provides him with a well-deserved respite and an opportunity to appreciate the finer things in life.

What a lovely story that would have been! Y'all never would have had to deal with Gabriel.

and THEN i thought, well, OV is a relatively small fanfic i'm using because it's mine. I wonder what happens if I ask:

what happens when he meets Crowley

And I got:

-- When Aziraphale meets Crowley, there is an undeniable spark of familiarity and camaraderie between them. They might reunite in a vineyard or a charming wine bar, drawn to each other by their shared history and mutual understanding.

Their encounter is marked by playful banter, witty exchanges, and a deep sense of connection. Aziraphale and Crowley have been through countless adventures together, and their reunion in wine country brings back memories of their past escapades.

As they catch up, Aziraphale and Crowley share stories, laughter, and a few glasses of wine. They reminisce about their efforts to thwart the apocalypse and the unconventional friendship that has formed between an angel and a demon.

Amidst the lightheartedness, there may also be moments of vulnerability and reflection. Aziraphale and Crowley discuss their experiences since their last encounter, their personal growth, and the challenges they've faced.

Together, they explore the local wineries, indulging in wine tasting experiences and discovering new vintages. Aziraphale, with his refined palate, offers his insights and appreciation for the artistry of winemaking, while Crowley, ever the connoisseur, adds his own unique perspective and wit.

Their time together in wine country is filled with warmth, friendship, and a deep bond that transcends their inherent differences. They find solace and comfort in each other's presence, knowing that they can rely on one another, despite their opposing natures.

Ultimately, the meeting between Aziraphale and Crowley in wine country is a celebration of their enduring friendship and the joy of shared experiences. They revel in the beauty of the surroundings, savor the flavors of the wine, and create new memories together, cherishing the special connection they have forged over centuries.

Note the mention of "the apocalypse" and "angel and demon" -- the addition of Crowley to the mix has led it back to Good Omens source material. None of this is in OV, which is an AU, and way way way way way WAY smaller than Good Omens as a whole, obviously -- but it didn't pick it up from those paragraphs. It knows Crowley and Aziraphale stopped the apocalypse.

And it's also still very much a summary of something. It isn't... it isn't writing what I would call fanfiction.

So what am I saying here? Nothing yet. I know a lot about writing; I know very little about AI.

I find its general coherency surprising and worrisome -- I'm so cynical that all I can see are the ways people could use it to steal and rewrite work, or fuck stuff up, but I'm sure there are cool things about it too. I don't think it's yet a challenger to work on AO3 written by humans.

I don't know what else to say about it but I wrote this whole thing, so like, idk man.

Comments

[rionaleonhart]

This is an interesting experiment! The writing is very clean and convenient, somehow, a bit soulless. As you say, it comes across as more of a summary than a fic.

If you'd like another AI's work for comparison, I plugged a few paragraphs of my Persona 4 fic Collapse into InferKit (formerly Talk to Transformer). The original text is in bold; the rest is AI-written. In comparison to ChatGPT, I feel InferKit's output is messier but a bit more spirited.

Yosuke’s shaking so badly that Yu can feel it through his entire body. “I don’t want to kill you.”

“What do you want?” Yu asks.

It feels like he doesn’t really understand what he’s asking until he actually voices it. The words prickle up his body as he says them. He feels too warm, he feels too aware of Yosuke at every point they’re touching. “Don’t try and hide from me. If you can’t tell me what you want, I can’t really help.”

He’s breathing hard. Yu hasn’t known Yosuke for long, but they haven’t been apart for long enough for him to be this shaken. Yu knows Yosuke well enough to know that he’s speaking the truth: If Yosuke was trying to trick him, Yu would recognize it in an instant.

“You really are scary, Yu.”

“I know.” Yu feels a quaver in his knees, despite himself. This has been a lot for him to handle. Yosuke might be a self-destructive pain in his ass, but Yu has known him for too long to know what he’s really saying.

He can barely hear Yosuke over his ragged breaths.

“I wanted to help, Yu.”

“I know. I’m sorry.” Yu takes a deep breath, struggling to keep his voice steady.

Yosuke just hangs there, dazed and bruised, weakened by his wound. Yu wants to run. He wants to run and never look back. He has never felt so lost, so helpless, as he does in this moment.

He turns Yosuke around and pulls his shirt up over his head. Yosuke blinks up at him and it’s clear to Yu that the hatred and disgust he saw in Yosuke’s eyes isn’t genuine, isn’t how he really feels. Yosuke still believes there is a way out of this situation. Yu tries to keep his voice steady, but it’s hard. He rubs his hands over his face and tries to hide the fear.

“You’re not going to hurt me, are you?” Yosuke asks.

“No,” Yu says. “I swear I won’t.” He turns to leave, but stops when he realizes that there’s no obvious way out. Even if they run out of the apartment, the street is full of people. He turns back to Yosuke and shakes his head.

“I can’t leave you like this.”

“Just do it.”

Yu turns back around and undoes the buttons of Yosuke’s pants.

(I have omitted a substantial quantity of absolute filth.)

[thenicochan]

This is all kinds of fascinating.

[lassarina]

It strikes me wildly how close the opening paragraph of not-OV is to the opening paragraph of Winterhawk.

[queenlua]

this was really interesting to read; thanks muchly for writing it up!