FANFIC COMMENT BATTLE
May. 9th, 2013 01:10 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
seventheIN OTHER NEWS LET'S PLAY DISTRACT SEV FROM EXHAUSTION AND HER LATEST ONCOMING ANXIETY ATTACK
LET'S PLAY A FANFICTION GAME
Leave a comment here with a fanfic prompt. The theme: Series. So prompt something that can be filled in multiples. Think "Five Things", that type of deal, except that the number is obviously unlimited. I'll leave some examples to start.
Then fill other people's. And then if you see a fill you like, reply and continue it. Let's be ridiculous.
Pretty much any fandoms apply, although I'd advise this particular group of folks to stick to Final Fantasy. (Backups include ...Gundam Wing?)
ENTERTAIN ME
LET'S PLAY A FANFICTION GAME
Leave a comment here with a fanfic prompt. The theme: Series. So prompt something that can be filled in multiples. Think "Five Things", that type of deal, except that the number is obviously unlimited. I'll leave some examples to start.
Then fill other people's. And then if you see a fill you like, reply and continue it. Let's be ridiculous.
Pretty much any fandoms apply, although I'd advise this particular group of folks to stick to Final Fantasy. (Backups include ...Gundam Wing?)
ENTERTAIN ME
FFVIII: Emails
Date: 2013-05-09 05:36 pm (UTC)Emails Squall has sent or recieved on the SeeD network.
FFIV
Date: 2013-05-09 05:37 pm (UTC)Edge goes visiting.
FFXIII
Date: 2013-05-09 05:37 pm (UTC)Times Sazh decided he was just too old for this bullshit.
FFVIII: Quistis
Date: 2013-05-09 07:38 pm (UTC)lol crack bait
Date: 2013-05-09 07:50 pm (UTC)FFV / XII / III / ALL THE THINGS crackfic
Date: 2013-05-09 09:07 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2013-05-09 10:09 pm (UTC)Here is one!
"Five Times Rydia has smacked Edge..."
GO!
Re: FFVIII: Quistis
Date: 2013-05-10 12:12 am (UTC)She should have realized it when she opened her door and the air smelled like perfume, but it had been a really long day, and her first thought was actually *damn, did the cat knock over my shampoo?
As the door closed behind her, her instincts registered that there was something different, and Quistis dropped her papers on the table next to the door and glanced around sharply. Nothing obvious was disturbed, but she was very particular about her own living quarters, and something was just not right about her suite.
Her nose again picked up a floral scent. She carefully crossed the sitting room -- and sneezed.
Sneezed again.
Her entire bedroom was covered in flowers: bright yellow daisies, red roses, long trailing branches of forsythia and cherry blossoms; vases full of white lilies and orange tulips; something looking decidedly like a one of forget-me-nots trailed across her pillow.
Quistis sneezed again. Her face itched. And her lungs felt a little... puffy.
[After Instructor Trepe spent three days in the infirmary, a note was passed around Trepie Central: flowers are a bad idea. Even the Great Instructor Trepe can be defeated by allergies. Don't let the Disciplinary Committee know!!]
Re: lol crack bait
Date: 2013-05-10 12:21 am (UTC)"I'm not touching that."
"Oh, you don' have to. I'll put it on ya."
"I am. Not. Touching that."
"I even got it in black. It'll suit ya. Don't you trust mah fashion sense?"
"I have actually noted a distinct lack of such ability."
"Smale. Cowboy hats are sexy."
"...Kinneas."
"C'mon."
"...if that abomination even touches my head, there will be hell to pay."
Re: FFV / XII / III / ALL THE THINGS crackfic
Date: 2013-05-10 12:33 am (UTC)"Aw, look," said a voice, "someone's late to me party."
Balthier froze, startled -- but only for a second, before swaggering into the room, gun cocked on his shoulder at his jauntiest angle.
"Your party, my good sir?" His shrug was deliberate. "You seem to have forgotten to invite the leading man."
"Bah," the other intruder spat. He stood: tall, his long coat dark and ornate, purple waves falling mid-back, tall dark boots and a thin curved sword (the hair, Balthier thought with a faint hint of jealousy, would be quite hard to maintain in a chase). "Ye ain't invitin' anyone else to me party. The dancin's over."
"Ah," Balthier said, "we have yet to see about that."
The other man cocked his head - Balthier noted aristocratic lines and a surprisingly feminine nose - and scoffed. "And just who do ye think ye are?"
"You don't recognize the most famous sky pirate east of the Westersand?" Balthier sighed and rolled his eyes. "Tragically sheltered, but I can forgive your confusion if you make this easy."
The other man burst out laughing. "Sky pirate? Sky pirate? Oh, me friend, you and yer fancy-arsed cloudboats got nothin' on me and me ship. Try real pirating, me good man, and get back to me once you've sailed the seas yerself."
There was a flash, and some smoke, and the other man vanished. By the time Balthier had recovered his sight, the treasure chest had been emptied.
no subject
Date: 2013-05-10 12:39 am (UTC)"So," Edge says. "That dragon."
Rydia sniffs, but doesn't turn her back, which he takes as a sign to continue.
"So that's the Eidolon God? Bahamut?"
"He is our Hallowed Father," she says, stiff but not angry. "The Feymarch sees him as a god, though Asura and Leviathan likely think of him as an equal."
"Like a cool dragon older brother?" Edge muses. "Certainly useful in a fight."
"Watch it," she says, and the warning is both playful and genuine. "I'll send him after you."
Edge wiggles his eyebrows dramatically. "I'd fight a dragon for you, my sweet."
He supposed he deserves the smack on the arm.
FFVI
Date: 2013-05-10 12:54 am (UTC)The Opera had five acts. Write the next four.
no subject
Date: 2013-05-10 01:01 am (UTC)Rydia nearly took Edge's cheek off with the force of her slap.
"I meant in your room! I like how you redecorated! Good grief, woman! What did you think I meant?"
Rydia blushed apologetically. "Sorry. Eidolon boy talk can be a little blue, sometimes."
"Forgiven, sweet lady," Edge rubbed his cheek. "But, if you would like for me to take a closer inspection of your bedroom, I'd be happy to make an extended visit!"
And then it was Edge's other cheek that stung like hell.
no subject
Date: 2013-05-10 01:25 am (UTC)Re: FFVI
Date: 2013-05-10 01:27 am (UTC)THIS
WILL HAPPEN AT WORK TOMORROW LOLZ
Re: FFVIII: Emails
Date: 2013-05-10 01:50 am (UTC)From: sleonhart@garden.ede
Subject: T-Rex
Attention, all Garden students and SeeDs:
The T-Rex is on a very specific and balanced diet. Hot dogs are not part of that diet. The Training Room crew have had a very difficult time with the clean-up.
So please stop. Anyone caught feeding the T-Rex hot dogs will be mandated to "poop duty". Or you will be spoken to by Mr. Dincht. Either way, Hyne help your soul.
Regards,
Squall the Commander
Re: FFVIII: Emails
Date: 2013-05-10 03:30 am (UTC)To: Tilmitt, Selphie [stilmitt@balamb.gdn]
Subject: RE: WE SHOULD TOTALLY DO ANOTHER GARDEN FESTIVAL!!1
No, Selphie. The first one wasn't bad, I will grant you that, but the last time we tried it, the riot after the concert ended up with three people in the infirmary and an entire nest of Grats on the loose inside Garden.
If you can find an off-site venue for this madness, then we'll talk.
PS. Don't even think about taking this to Esthar. I have enough lunatics to deal with as it is.
-----
From: sleonhart [sleonhart@balamb.gdn]
To: Trepe, Quistis [qtrepe@balamb.gdn]
Subject: re: damn these reports
Q -
Attached are copies of this month's expenses and budget. I understand the desire to set them on fire while trying to translate from Bureaucratic to English, but please stop, that's the second printer we've gone through this year.
Also, re: "post-mind-numbing-meeting shots", hell yes.
-S
-----
From: sleonhart [sleonhart@balamb.gdn]
To: All Balamb Garden Staff and Students
Subject: Proper use of Garden computers and network
There is no delicate way of saying this.
The next person to get caught, either red-handed or by Garden's IT team, using Garden technology to:
-Download porn
-Upload porn
-Produce porn (personal note: What. The. Hell.)
will be either demoted, expelled, or fed to the goddamn T-rexaur. I'm not saying don't do these things; I'm saying don't do them in a way that I have to explain to Headmaster Kramer.
I hope we all understand each other.
-Squall Leonhart
Commander
Balamb Garden
Re: FFIV
Date: 2013-05-10 04:15 am (UTC)Edge Geraldine was bored. Bored, bored, bored, bored bored.
And as everyone in Eblan knew, having their prince be bored was a very bad thing indeed.
Or at least, Edge reflected glumly, sitting on his throne as his ministers droned on and on at each other, swinging his foot over the arm of the throne because he was just that desperate for motor release, everyone knew that but his ministers. Because they insisted to run the kingdom, the day-to-day (boring) business of governing, so much more efficiently than he ever could, and then they insisted he had to sit there while they blathered about it.
He tuned them out, shifted position so that his tunic would hide the evidence, and thought about Rydia. Which always helped. Sort of.
It helped so much, in fact, that he was quite startled by the sudden silence descended; came back to attention to find his court staring at him. "Eh--- what?" he asked, a little too bluntly for manners, and then winced; his mother would have smacked him for it. (Maybe that's why he likes Rydia so much.) "I mean, excuse me?"
The chancellor gives a tired chuckle. "I suggested, Your Young Highness, that a visit to the rulers of the other nations of the world might be in order. Eblan does have a tendency to be isolated---" isolationist is more like it, Edge thinks wryly--- "And it would be foolish not to maintain those ties of friendship which you forged with so many other monarchs in the heat of battle."
"You mean the fact that a bunch of us saved the planet's collective ass is now about to become political capital," Edge says dryly, and gets the expected reactions to that remark.
"Your Young Highness," the chancellor says, a little sternly, "do you object to this plan?"
Edge opens his mouth to do just that--- then does a double-take.
Maybe his ministers do know what a bad idea it is to let him get bored, after all.
"When do I leave?" he asks.
(A/N: Cliffhanger for a reason--- have at it, all!)
FFVIII
Date: 2013-05-10 05:41 am (UTC)Re: FFV / XII / III / ALL THE THINGS crackfic
Date: 2013-05-10 06:01 am (UTC)(RUSTY MUSE IS RUSTY)
Date: 2013-05-10 06:20 am (UTC)I mean, sure, they were L'Cie now, but he was still officially TOO OLD FOR THIS SHIT.
Knees. Had the others left 'em up in that C'ieth-ridden funhouse of horror, or did they just pop 'em out and regrow 'em with a potion when his back was turned?
"Chocobo," he said, watching Farron bound up an ice cliff and disappear over the lip, "Don't suppose you know where I can pick up some cheap wings." He looked woefully back at the last 'cycle they'd knocked out of commission.
"This way!" Vanille said, twinkling past him and bobbing from perch to perch like a goddamn soap bubble.
Sooner or later, he guessed, that one was going to pop. Nobody right in the head could be that cheerful at a time like this.
"Come on," Hope said, stumping past him. "We're falling behind."
Maybe they could rub some of Vanille's sugar and unicorn farts off on Sulky. Otherwise it was gonna be a long walk, no matter where they were headed.
Sighing, Sazh set a boot on an ice-slick boulder.
Which was when an icy, sheep-sized toad hit him square in the face. As he toppled spluttering into a snowdrift, swore and fired point blank, he knew he was defintely TOO. *BLAM* OLD. *BLAM*. FOR *BLAM* THIS. *BLAM* SHIT.
Katzroy Files: Case 4
Date: 2013-05-10 07:29 am (UTC)Especially when being in the Guardian Corps didn't allow him to give as much as he should.
But this. This was an indignity upon his person!
He looked up at the verdant tree branches of this cyprus tree down the street. Tracking down the perp wasn't easy. Too-Tall Tommy, as Dajh whispered so fearfully to him, was caught by the ear and was brought to Mrs. Too-Tall (Sazh got into the habit of calling any child's parent in Dajh's manner of reference) where the accuser Rebekkah Steiner aired her grievances. The case would have been wrapped up a lot sooner if there wasn't that sub-clause in the contract where he had to find the victim who had escaped from Too-Tall Tommy's clutches.
Good thing he got the best assistants in the world to help him out.
Chocobo flapped its tiny arms up to where the lost cat, just barely out of kittenhood, really, was clinging onto a high branch with big fearful eyes and flattened ears. The very picture of tragedy. Chocobo (his mind was still taking some time to wrap around 'Chocolina,') had ambled up to flutter around the cat which then perked up in great interest at the yellow ball of fluff bumbling around it.
"Uh... Daddy?" asked Dajh uncertainly.
"Yeah, son?"
"We could get some other people to help. Like, a ladder."
"Good idea, Deputy Dajh. I think Ol' Mrs. Crabapple have a good ten footer in her utility shed. I don't think this cat is going anywhere soo-"
And no sooner had he said that, the cat was standing up and paying all its attention to Chocolina, imminent danger be damned; this kitty was intent to bat all its paws on that bird!
"Dajh, get that ladder now, I'm going to get that stop that cat from moving around willy nilly!" Sazh grabbed the trunk of the tree in a great big bear hug and began to shimmy up to the first branch.
"Wait Dad, uh, I'll be right back!"
Sazh was on the second tier of the tree, and he's gotta say, for an near 40-year old man, he's got a good rhythm going. Though, creeping thoughts of twigs and leaves and cobwebs stuck on any part of his body made gooseflesh appear all over his body. Man, what if that cat just kept going higher? Chocolina, smart bird, seemed to get the idea that it has the charm power to lead the little cat away from danger. But just as it's a smart and bold bird, it's eyeing those claws and big eyes with great apprehension.
It peeped frantically at Sazh, prompting him to say, "I know, I know! I'm coming to get you, too! Just don't get that animal any nearer to the ground!"
The cat, upon seeing him approaching, meowed plaintively and arches its back in apprehension. Sazh immediately switched tactics.
"Hey, kitty kitty. Don't worry now, Ol' Sazh here is coming to get you and bring you on down. Just don't claw at me or try anything risky, like accidental suicide. Wait, cats land on their feet, right? Can't I just get it to jump off- No! Bad Sazh! I may not be an Animal Cop, but that is a vicious vicious thought I just made."
A familiar voice called from below which made his eyes go round as saucers and his brow furrowed in an shameful, darkened scowl.
"So. Looks like the Kaztroy Detective Agency is taking on all kinds of jobs for its new employees. Oh wait, you're the only employee."
"Good to know that ever since I left, you started talking more often. How about directing that infamous Precision Lightning word strike off from this tree?"
Maybe he should have retired at the spry old age of 40 and not try to do that mid-life crisis of having his own detective agency.
Re: FFVIII: Emails
Date: 2013-05-10 08:37 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2013-05-10 08:38 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2013-05-10 08:38 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2013-05-10 08:38 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2013-05-10 08:39 am (UTC)Re: Katzroy Files: Case 4
Date: 2013-05-10 11:07 am (UTC)YESSSSSS
ALL OF THIS IS AMAZING
DEPUTY DAJH OMG
Baron
Date: 2013-05-10 11:45 am (UTC)"You look well, Edge," Rosa tells him kindly.
"And I'm glad you finally accepted our invitation," Cecil says. "We were starting to worry you'd never emerge."
"Yeah, yeah." Edge is leaning back in his chair, feet propped up on the dining room table. He's glad to see Cecil and Rosa, he really is, but they aren't - he'd forgotten just how good they both are, so perfect they make him act up instinctively so that no one will ever compare him to them and realize how obviously he comes up short. He feels twelve again, and reminds himself he's been royal longer than either of them, as if that matters. "So how's all the ruling stuff?"
"Difficult," Cecil admits. "As you would know."
"I'm sure Edge never has difficulties," Rosa teases him gently. "Who would cause trouble to the great ninja lord?"
"Ha," Edge says, because that's funny. "Ha bloody ha."
Cecil unfolds the piece of paper in front of him, smooths it out carefully. "Your missive says you're interested in seeing Baron's reconstruction efforts. We can walk you through the town tomorrow, and you can take yourself through the castle-"
"Probably already has," Rosa murmurs, "just stay out of my undergarments drawer," and Edge is reminded just how much he likes her.
"-and then later this weekend we can all take a journey to Mist if you'd like," Cecil finishes, with a pointed look at his wife. A very pointed look.
Re: (RUSTY MUSE IS RUSTY)
Date: 2013-05-10 11:45 am (UTC)SAZH
LIGHTING
VANILLE
YES SAZH. I AGREE
no subject
Date: 2013-05-10 12:01 pm (UTC)"Happy birthday!" Edge threw himself through the door with great flourish - his best ninja flourish - fancy-wrapped sparkling gift in hand and a giant smile on his face, because it was Rydia's party and she was--
--crying?
He froze. Her head jerked up: eyes red, face puffy, lips still quivering; she looked startled, and hurt, and utterly offended. He just stood there, confused; why was she on the floor crying and how the hell had he been supposed to know about this? He stared; she stared.
"You're early," she said, choking it through sobs. "Hours early, Edge."
"Well," he said awkwardly, shifting from foot to foot, "I wanted to maybe celebrate with you in private?"
That was the wrong thing to say. Rydia stood up, sniffled defiantly, took two angry stalking steps across the room, and slapped him.
Then before he could say anything she crumbled against his chest and sobbed into his shoulder, her hands clutching his shirt. Bemused, confused, and four steps farther from understanding Rydia than he'd ever been, Edge simply wrapped his arms around her and held her until her tears went dry.
(Later, Edge found out that Rydia's "anniversary gathering" was not in fact a poor mistranslation of birthday party, but a memorial service for Mist and her mother. He nearly punched himself.)
Re: FFVIII
Date: 2013-05-10 12:06 pm (UTC)Dear Kiros,
I'm so sorYou have to know I'm -Do you remember that time when we snuck out of the barracks and went fishing? Ward fell in the stream and we had to lend him some of our clothes so that he could get back into the base and not be dripping wet but he didn't really fit in your pants?that's what she saidPriceless, man.I don't know why I'm thinking of that. Probably because
it's funnyI was a jerkass for taking that photo and posting it in the mess hall, and unfortunately in my old age, being a jerkass to my friends unfortunately reminds me of all the other times I was a jerkass before.it's a lot of timesyou ever get the feeling we're too old?Anyway, man, I am really sorry I trashed your car. Let me take you fishing. I promise
I won't throw you off the boatthere will be beer.Laguna
no subject
Date: 2013-05-10 12:46 pm (UTC)He tries to reply in the right places, make affirmative noises - he maybe doesn't care specifically about the story, but it's Elle and he cares generally and very much about her happiness - and tries to keep his eyes either on her face or on his own plate, but ... she'll shrug, and his eyes inevitably land on the graceful lines of her bare shoulders, the soft slope of her neck, the way her skin looks like it's glowing.
They make it through the meal - Ellone, of course, glides gracefully; Squall stumbles - and as they're leaving Squall decides fuck it and reaches out, briefly, to brush his fingers along the nape of her neck. "You look nice," he says.
- - -
Back in her hotel room, Ellone can't stop smiling at herself in the mirror: Squall noticed.
no subject
Date: 2013-05-10 12:47 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2013-05-10 01:05 pm (UTC)Babymagic, though low in power and relatively harmless, can however be quite the disturbance in any Mysidian household. Chapter Two will discuss some of the common manifestations, and Chapter Three will present some basic mechanisms and coping spells to help deflect the worst of your young mage's babymagic.
-- Lady Estella, "Raising A Mysidian Prodigy", Chapter One
- - -
The game started after they learned to speak. They'd sneak up on each other, chase each other, laugh and taunt and cry - until once when Porom got so angry she lit the carpet on fire.
They both sat and stared at it, mouths round in childish fascination until the young mage at the orphanage smelled smoke and burst in, quenching the flames with an impressive ice spell that only fascinated both twins even more.
The next day Palom got Porom to punch him repeatedly in the stomach (not, in fact, a very difficult feat) until he was crying, only to find that in-between one tiny fist and the next he'd sprouted some sort of shield that made Porom's next punch ricochet off so that her arm ended up striking her own chest.
They spent a good portion of the next few weeks antagonizing each other to the point of magic: neither one was old enough to handle even a basic level spell, said the Elder, but it didn't stop Palom from freezing the bowl of fruit Porom tried to dump on his head, and it didn't stop Porom from frying half of Palom's hair off with electric shock; it didn't stop Palom from floating himself out of Porom's reach, or Porom slowing Palom's charge to an impeded crawl.
And none of their magical prowess stopped them from being locked in their room without supper as punishment the day Porom lit the table on fire and Palom reflected everyone's attempts to grab him.
They sat in opposite corners and sulked for a while, but nothing keeps twins separated for long, and they found themselves standing side-by-side, staring at the window blocking them from freedom.
"What if," Porom said slowly, "what if instead of fighting, we... did it together?"
"Huh," Palom said, already reaching out to take her hand. "Don't we have to be angry to do it?"
"Don't tell me you're not angry at the Elder," Porom said, and she squeezed his hand.
"Ha," Palom said. "Stuffy old geezer doesn't get to tell us what to do."
The resulting spell lifted them both off the floor and tossed them through the hole in the wall where a window had mysteriously vanished. The resulting chase took three hours and extraneous use of the Stop spell.
The next day Palom and Porom stopped fighting (as much); they'd realized how much more powerful they were together.
no subject
Date: 2013-05-10 01:08 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2013-05-10 01:32 pm (UTC)NEXT ROUND'S ON ME
Re: FFVIII
Date: 2013-05-10 03:14 pm (UTC)FFVI
Date: 2013-05-10 10:00 pm (UTC)Re: FFVIII: Emails
Date: 2013-05-10 11:00 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2013-05-10 11:04 pm (UTC)Re: Baron
Date: 2013-05-10 11:53 pm (UTC)But they aren't here; they're back home actually running his country for him, and he's here staying out of their hair (and, okay, trying not to sweat fireballs at the prospect of seeing Rydia again.) (If Rydia is even in Mist, because last he'd heard from her, she was going home to the Feymarch--- "When you see me again, I'll be old enough to be your mother," she'd told him, with downright gleeful malice, the last time they'd met.)
Gradually, though--- and not least because it's a welcome distraction from his thoughts about Rydia!--- Edge manages to pick up on some of the differences. The Eblanese, much as he hates to say it, had kind of gotten lucky: Rubicante (the fucker) had chased them out of Eblan Keep proper, and they'd lost his parents (to Dr. Lugae, the goat-fucker)--- but there's a difference between a strategic retreat followed by guerrilla warfare (especially guerrilla warfare led by the flower of ninja manhood, namely himself) and... occupation.
Which is what Baron went through. And it's all thanks to fucking Golbez.
Cecil's fucking brother.
Edge manages not to say anything on that subject. And also manages to keep his foot out of his mouth about Kain fucking Highwind, who is conspicuous by his absence. (Edge considers this highly, highly suspicious. But Cecil and Rosa haven't asked for his help on that or any subject, and if they want it, they can damn well ask.)
He kind of hopes this newfound reticence is a good sign for his ability to get through a few hours in Rydia's presence without her hitting him.
On the other hand, he kind of misses her hitting him. So maybe he's just saving up.
Re: Katzroy Files: Case 4
Date: 2013-05-11 06:36 am (UTC)CAGNAZZO AIMS TO CREATE AN ENTIRE DETECTIVE SERIES FOR YOU. LIKE IT'S THE WISHBONE SERIES OR SAM SPADE FOR CHILDREN.