seventhe: (Cats: I LIKE THEM)
[personal profile] seventhe


Sit On My Dick: A Musical

Locke Cole had always been curious about exploring musical theater; ever since he met the dandy gambler Setzer, his interest had increased tenfold. He had never had the courage to take part until the bartender of his favorite club had offered a job that might finally pay off his loans from that last operation. It was more solid than the dancing job, considering he had to compete with Edge, the tip whore. Petty jealousy was a great motivator.

He had one night left, and he was torn between making it memorable and simply wafting quietly out of that sordid life and on to greater possibilities (including, if he played his cards right, the possibility of turning Edge into another sort of whore altogether). The choice was rather taken out of his hands when he arrived to find that Laguna -- not only the man who had taught him to dance, but also the old guilty flame that yet left twists of sour bile in his groin at the memory of how right and wrong it had felt -- was on tonight.

Locke's heart raced and Johnson throbbed in time to the fresh beats resounding through the musty dance floor as he gazed at laguna's gleaming, oiled-up man-pecs.

"My hills are alive with the sound of penis!" Laguna belted out, starting his set.

His massive bulge reminded Locke of a different kind of treasure hunting, and he began to hum along with the beautiful well endowed man's song, shimmying his slim svelte hips and beginning to rub his hard groin on the nearest warm body, staring at the chestnut haired beauty...only to realize it was his rival there at the club, Edge!!!

He soon realized that he couldn't resist his human urges and soon beckoned Edge to lower his rhino inspired cog piece to give him what he had forgotten to give him for Christmas...the steamiest blow job...ever!

Locke fluttered his kohl-lined ashes and pulled Edge into one of the many private alcoves lining the club; he smirked as Edge's wanton eyes raked his body. He had worn his best torn mesh shirt, low cut leather pants that dipped below his innie navel and showed off his moderate bulge, and his usual bandana and nipple rings.

Edge was resplendent in wide-legged raver pants-- tight, however, at the front where his erection raged and wept-- the whale-tail of his shiny PVC thong poking up over the waistband, his curvaceous ass a veritable feast for Locke's jealous, thieving gaze. His hands glided over the supple curves before his eyes as the club issued Moogle's tuft gently brushed against the head of Locke's rampant cock; a soft "quoop" drifted up from the alabaster sexbeast crouching betwixt his thighs.

His tongue left a glistening line of desire up Locke's trembling sex; a whimpered, desperately pleading sound coursed from his lips, "Gods, please...more." Need raged within him nearly as throbbingly as the desperate anger and jealousy: this man, soon to be his rival, challenged him even now with his clever tongue, his plump lips, the impeccable work of his harlot fingers.

"I want you to ravage me with your ninjerly wiles," Locke growled with a lusty tremor, and Edge nibbled and wibbled at his silver-ringed nips like a hungry babe.

"But first you must prove to me your sex is supreme. Spread for me!"

Edge didn't need a second invitation, bending over the stone wall of the ancient stone club (this bastion of sin used to be a cathedral, as Setzer had shown Locke on his tour of the historical parts of the city........... SETZER!!!!!!!........the object of his true love, how could he forget?!!!.......he began to sob inconsolably as the hot ninjerly mouth slowly enveloped his hard thievery cock, crying out the name of his true love in distressed apology....yet it felt so good!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Becoming enthralled with this lusty demonic skin pole, Edge, shuttering at the thought of swallowing this man's unbearable load, was prepared to do so until he began to hiccup. This was problematic due to the fact that there was no time to take a breath, the geyser was coming; "Shazzzam!" cooed Locke as the white cream sprayed all over the boyish face of Edge as he pulled away to take a breath.

Date: 2012-07-30 01:40 am (UTC)
lindorie: (irvine hearts snape!)
From: [personal profile] lindorie
I AM DYING

LUSTY DEMONIC SKIN POLE

OH MY GOD

Date: 2012-07-30 02:34 am (UTC)
novel_machinist: (Default)
From: [personal profile] novel_machinist
RITE MOAR OMG

Date: 2012-07-30 05:26 pm (UTC)
novel_machinist: (Default)
From: [personal profile] novel_machinist
ZOMG YOU ARE SO MEEEEN

Date: 2012-07-30 06:17 am (UTC)
ser_pounce_alot: (Default)
From: [personal profile] ser_pounce_alot
THIS IS THE GREATEST FANFIC EVER

Date: 2012-07-30 04:13 pm (UTC)
crankyoldman: Lin Bei Fong is watching YOU [Legend of Korra] (lin bei fong (watching))
From: [personal profile] crankyoldman
I THINK PERHAPS YOUR CANON RESEARCH IS WRONG. HIS CODPIECE SHOULD RESEMBLE A KOALA, NOT A RHINO. IT SAYS SO IN THE ULTIMANIA.

Date: 2012-07-31 02:36 am (UTC)
lassarina: (Default)
From: [personal profile] lassarina
oh my God

This is even better than the ACen version.

Date: 2012-07-31 06:38 am (UTC)
From: [personal profile] deadcellredux
MASTERPIECE

Date: 2012-08-03 01:35 am (UTC)
From: [personal profile] flecksofpoppy
I CAN'T GO ON. ALL OF MY CONFIDENCE HAS BEEN OBLITERATED AFTER READING THIS MASTERPIECE. HOW COULD I EVER WRITE AGAIN?!

............... NOOOOO!!!!! .................

Date: 2012-08-03 01:39 am (UTC)
From: [personal profile] flecksofpoppy
P.P.S. I just re-re-read the whole thing, and laughed so hard I almost legit threw up.

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