the trick is to keep breathing

Well, February ended nicely (excellent weekend at Chez lassarina), but I'm hoping the "In like a lion" phrasing applies, because March started off a bit of a whirlwind and I'm hoping there's a little "out like a lamb" in my future.

First: couldn't sleep last night, which was awesome. Not sure what undid me; the 3:00pm coffee in the airport (unusual, as I drink coffee all through my until-6-pm workday), or the general OCD of my brain, or maybe IDK my BFF insomnia again. Kittens were adorable and got the sleep I didn't, at least.

Second: work projects exploding (not literally (this time!)) everywhere. I love workplace wank, but I'm not dumb enough to talk about it unlocked; let's just say today has been interesting. Straaaange things are going on and it is strange and intriguing yet frustrating. Also I think my March is going to suck balls in relation to the sheer number of pounds of polymer I'm personally responsible for. My Marches always seem to suck this way. I don't understand. Ugh ugh ugh. WAH WAH HAS TO WORK FOR LIVING.

Third: Feeling general ridiculous urge to spend moneys. Rina and Kas hath convinced me to get a PSP, but I also want a laptop. Also I saw Dragon Age this weekend and I waaaaaaant. WTF self. Because I need to spend more money on video games I don't have time to play?

Fourth: Today has been such a clusterfuck and I'm really behind on writing. >.> astrangerenters don't kill me; your fic just turned long last week and I'm hoping you'd rather have a long funny story full of snarky shenanigans than something quick (it is like 10 smallish parts) because that is what has happened to it. My writing to-do list is getting longer by the moment though and I'm almost eagerly awaiting the "HOFUCK Panic Party" I have to have this week/weekend to get certain things completed.

Fifth: I got nothin'.

So one of my (few) (simpler) goals for 2010 involves original writing. I've committed again to getyourwordsout, for 200,000 words -- I made it in 2009 (albeit just barely), and I had a lot of fun doing it and wrote a few things I'm quite happy with. I found it an excellent motivator for weeks I wasn't doing much of anything writing-wise, and I'm quite proud to say "I wrote (probably over) 200,000 words in 2009". So I'm back in 2010 with 200K, but I'm mixing it up a little.

Every year I say I'm going to write Beacons, but this year I think I mean it, or I'm going to start out that way. Other than the one fanfiction project I have in my sights, everything else is going to go on hold while I get Beacons started. It doesn't mean I'm quitting fanfiction - I will still need it for sanity breaks and writer's-block and crazy memes and the like - but my focus is going to be on original work for early 2010.

My brother Jim is my partner in this project, and one of the reasons I'm excited to start is that he and I are closer to being on the same page communication-commitment-and-time-wise. We're setting up some online things to work on to accompany the story.

One of the biggest things I need to figure out is where/how to post it, because I want to be posting it or at least sending it out - one of the things that'll get me to write this is public accountability. I haven't yet decided whether to post it on my website, or on LJ/DW. I do know I want to do one of the two; I also know I'd prefer my website, but I don't have a very feasible or convenient way to do so unless I get around to installing something like FictionPress in the next few days. (Suggestions: welcome.) I don't mind posting it on LJ/DW at all, mainly because that's where a lot of friends/readers are, but as it's original work I kind of want it in my "own" space.

I'm going to be posting it as a serial. One chapter or "episode" every week. I'd need ~3800 words per week to hit the 200K, so hopefully each chapter/episode can be 3000-4000 words. Ideally I'll get the story written this year, and then I can edit it together into actual chapters in 2011.

(I also hope to do one illustration per week, but I don't want to boldly commit to that because I know my own schedule and I know that class this year might suck ass. But I do want to get back to drawing again, and one illustration of my own work per week sounds really awesome! It would be a lot of fun! And then I'd be learning about drawing too! So, we'll see.)

Jim and I have gathered a small group of mutual friends who would be interested in keeping up with our work, because there's nothing like the motivation of knowing people are reading your stuff and waiting for the next little bit and getting into your story/characters/etc. I've also chatted with a few other people about working with us. This would be more in a gamma-reading sense -- as we post the story, comment on things that are awesome, things that are confusing, general thoughts, etc. so that as we continue (and edit) we can work improvements into the story. If you're interested in being on that email filter, let me know. :) It's not like the story will be a big secret, locked somewhere no one can see it - I said I was posting it publicly - but I also acknowledge that it's still very much a work in progress.

So that's my first big plan. People who've been watching this journal might be like, "Sev, you so crazy! You don't have time for this!" Well, a very serious and personal goal for 2010 is to get back my (personal) time no matter how far I have to go. This is one very awesome way of doing so.

NaNoWriMo starts on Sunday. 50,000 words in November.

I am seventhe on the NaNo website, btw, so feel free to friend me if you want cheering, but I'm not really doing official NaNo this year.

Why not? How to put this simply. I'm losing 10/30 days in November for my brother's wedding, reception, and my personal vacation in-between the two. And that's the most optimistic estimate – not taking into account packing/preparing for said trip, recovery time from said trip, the final I have right after said trip, or anything involving Thanksgiving. Since the more realistic estimate leaves me about 50% of November to work with, I'll be frank: NaNo is not happening for me this year.

I'm going to participate in the way I usually do, since Novembers are busy months for my personal life – writing what I can, inputting it into the website, and cheering on my friends who have a much better chance of making 50K.

I'll be using the NaNo fervor to spur myself on into writing whatever words I can, because I'm still close enough to being on-track with getyourwordsout that I can make 200K by the end of this year as long as I stay on track. So that's my goal! Stay on track, self.

It's sad because there are so many things I want to write right now! My brains are frazzled and fried from le wedding, and from school, and from work, which makes even basic sub-dire life feel frazzling and frying. And yet the ideas keep coming! And I get excited about them! But then I get more frazzled! CLEARLY I AM A PROFESSIONAL.

And then I post about writing and being frazzled rather than doing anything productive. DON'T MIND ME.

I'm spammy today, guys, sorry.

I've been thinking about NaNoWriMo this year, as always. I'd write Beacon, like I always do, and probably make a lot of progress on it. But again, we're going on a Thanksgiving vacation, and as amazing as I am I don't think I can write the required 50,000 words in 20 days. I didn't last year, and I didn't the year before. And ILU NaNo, but I'm not giving up my vacation this year.

So I thought... why not do something different? I've been wanting to draw more, and I've been wanting to get into Beacon. So I thought, maybe I'll draw, one page of Beacon every day. Not totally FINISH like through the computer and everything, but draw in the sketchbook, one page of the comic every day. If I get behind, I'll draw two pages. At the end, I'll have a start, and I can scan them in and start working on them in Photoshop while I (hopefully) continue the story. The other benefit is that a sketchbook could come on vacation with me, technically. (I'm not sure whether I'd stick to it, but there's a chance.)

On the one hand, writing, yay! Getting back into it, getting more story down. On the other hand, drawing! Finally making myself draw daily to get better.

So I can't decide. And because my batch totally F-ed up and I'm cranky, I figured I'd write a poll on it. What do you guys think?

[Poll #1275003]

Yes, that's right! It's another ACTION-PACKED POST FROM SEV.

JanNoWriMo, my fake NaNo to make up for the fact that November always sucks a nut for writing in my personal schedule, will officially start Monday, Jan 07. Because I say so! Also because a lot of the players will be gone this weekend at Ohayocon. Although if you want to start right now, go ahead! You're awesome.

The point of JanNoWriMo is basically to write as many words as you can! I will be starting with HNtDB and bottle_of_shine's country music cowboy bodyguard porn (NAY A LITTLE BIRD TOLD ME IT WAS YOUR BIRTHDAY? HAPPY BIRTHDAY! PORN FOR YOU AS SOON AS I CAN!) and then moving into origific. There's no 50K goal; there's no 50K limit. We're just writing words. Set your own goal and come write with me; I need people to cheer me on. XD

AND ON THAT NOTE

IT'S THE NEXT CHAPTER OF SIR HILLDO

OVER FIVE WEEKS LATE

THIS ONE'S FOR jennyclarinet! Who is hot.

Penis Text Adventures, Part III
Rating: Well, PG-13 or R, depending on how you rate curse words and mentions of buttsex
Characters: Sir Hilldo, some shitty orcs, a mysterious girl, a surprisingly cute pet, and drunks!

Summary: In which a plot takes over and all of you invariably get bored and tell us to STFU and/or go back to being funny. Sir Hilldo defends his slut maiden's honor, amuses the townsfolk, and gets a kitty!

( The Shield of +1 to Herpes )- - -

Sometimes I make me laugh.

I! I will be honest!!

FFEX Status = SCREWWWWWED.
Sev Status = Panic!

Good: over 1300 words written, and I like them!
BAD: I AM NOWHERE NEAR DONE. IF I TELL THE STORY I WANT TO TELL, IT WILL PROBABLY TAKE ME LIKE >8000 WORDS. OMG.

Even worse: I want to write another one of my prompts, too!!

I AM A HORRIBLE MODLY EXAMPLE.

#1: Wow, ff_exchange takes a lot of time! XD. bottle_of_shine, justira, and I have been working our butts off on matching and the trials involved in it, and so far all I have to say is that I really, really hope this is going to rock, hard. I'm very (cautiously) excited about this! Everyone seems to be pleased so far and people are being really helpful about everything involved! THX GUYZ, YOU RULE.

This wouldn't be a Sev post without Sev Capslock.

#2: To whomever has my prompts for FFEX:

First of all, thank you for being an awesomesauce part of the exchange! I mean this! I love you already.

Really, the prompts I gave are things I'm curious about, so I'm not really expecting anything other than seeing someone else's take on them! And that alone will make me smile. Feel free to interpret any of them in any way you'd like. I like different and creative, as long as it's believable to the characters!

If you really want me to talk about them in more detail, well, uh ...I can always give more geekery. ( I will ramble on it some more! )

Like I said before, I really will be happy with anything within these prompts! Obviously I've given a lot of leeway and that is because I am not picky, and seeing other people's creativity totally makes me SQUEE. SQUEE WITH JOY!

#3: I, uh, apologize to the other comms I've been neglecting, particularly ff_epicfic! I WILL BE BACK.

#4: My prompts for FFEX delight me to an inordinate amount. If I can find the time I will be writing at least two of them, if not all three. They are delicious.

Hey guys, it's that holiday time again. Y'all know how much I love Christmas and the holidays season in general, so this is for any of you, whether you celebrate anything or not - or if you just want gifties. These are for you guys! Feel free to ask for anything! including hot sex! I had a couple different ideas spurred by different discussions, so - that's why the post is so damn long.

Giftie Number One: Fic Request

Simple. Request a fic. Ask for whatever you'd like. Fun, OTPs, crack you wish existed, AUs, anything.

Give me the following information:

Fandom (I will write for Final Fantasy IV, V, VI, VII, VIII, IX, X, X-2. I am no good with FFVII canon past AC. Also will do crossovers.)

Characters or pairing (I have no problem with het, slash, femme, crack, or genfic and character studies - just be kind XD)

Situation / Prompt / Genre (By this I mean: Do you want smut? Do you want happy fluff? Snark? Humour? Angst? Crack? Plot? No Plot? Bananas? Would you like fries with that?)

I'll write you something about 1000 words (probably over, knowing me) fulfilling your request. The writing will take place during January, probably, and I'm a first-come, first-served woman.

Giftie Number Two: Feedback Request

This is something I came up with after discussions with bottle_of_shine and lassarina. There's a lot of talk about feedback and concrit in this fandom, and where it is and how to get it. So one of the other things I'll be volunteering to do is deliver comments / feedback / beta-ing / concrit. I'm talking everything from grammar/structure to characterization and mood -- whatever you'd like, I'll do my best to deliver on.

My fandoms are listed above - I'm pretty dorkily anal on all of them (except maaaaaybe V). I will also review original!fic (although I would ask that you don't throw me in the middle of your NaNoWriMo-verse, at least without warning - i.e., short plz.). If you'd like some thorough concrit on something in December/January - long, short, a series of drabbles, a bunch of chapters, one thing, many things - I'm available. This can be my Christmas gift to you. Also, if you know someone who doesn't know me but has been looking for concrit - send them my way! I'm willing to share the holiday love with strangers.

This request is meant for people looking to get actual concrit and feedback. If you're looking for brainless praise - well, if that's what you really want for the holidays, I can give you that, but please - serious requesters only.

Gifties for me

I've seen this going around as a semi-fandom-meme -- what would you like to see for Christmas? Well, since I am selfish and love gifts as well, I've got a couple lists. The first is fic I'd love to receive as a gift. The second is fic I'm dying to write, and if it tickles your fancy, why not request it and give me an excuse. (You'll notice the two lists coincide occasionally, hee!)

( Fic I would love to see )

( Fic I would love to write )

So. Feel free to request anything you want - I'm putting no limit on it for now, but remember that I am not entirely made of internets. If you've got a wishlist of your own and you'd like to just link me to that, leave it in a comment.

GO check brokenprism or ff.net for the latest installment of "How Not to Date Blondes". This is the best one yet. I literally giggled through the entire writing process.

Also, if anyone here is still reading "Shine Like Gold" (and hell, it's okay if you're not, I'm barely reading the damn thing), there's a new chapter up at ff.net, Chapter 15: The Cracks in the Ice.

It's mostly fluff, but it serves its purpose. After writing HNtDB with Enkida, I've gotten the bug for writing long multi-chaptered fic again. However, I insisted to myself that I finish SLG first. It's hard to pick up a story after not touching it for a year, dude! But I did. I'll wrap it up, and then I'll be able to continue on some of those other projects (all the shit Rina has bunnied me for, mostly).

SO, yes. Also, in better mood than last night. Thanks to those who left happy words.

October who?!

First things first: Manly Request Week is officially over. WOW. I'd never expected (1) to get that many or (2) that they would take so long. You can browse the finished collection here or browse by character in brokenprism's tags here.

I'm actually pleased with most of them. "Garage" (for bottle_of_shine) is rushed and I know it, but that's what happens when you write at work and you know you only have 20min to finish this piece and then you have to go home; however, the idea was good, and it may be expanded on, mostly because Seifer is now eating my brains. "Duties" (for scribe_protra) suffers from voice issues as well, but I've identified my problem there (which mostly involved starting with a piece from last year rather than starting from scratch! but ah well), so I think I've learned something!

Sigh. So now I have October to catch up on claims, work on "Shine Like Gold" and "How Not To Date Blondes", and plan out NaNo for November!

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In other news, hilldo, is it true that every other member of the J-Squad got a piece on Friday night but you? HEE.

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So really. Where did September go? And why'd it go so freaking fast?!